Whan You Finally Choose Yourself with Sandra Lena Silverman

What advice would you give to someone who feels stuck in their situation to they want to improve their self. Maybe it's not just physical. Maybe they want to improve themselves and how they feel emotionally, mentally and physically. What's the first step they could do to take to get unstuck?

I would say try to find a life coach, a spiritual healer, Reiki, anything that you can do to make yourself, you know, feel better and have like an outside person help you. If you don't want a therapist, then try a spiritual healer or a life coach and try to do things for yourself, like take time for yourself because a lot of people don't. They're busy with their kids, they're busy with work, and they don't take extra time for their self. And everybody needs to have time for themselves. The right amount of sleep is helpful and also making sure that you're completely balanced like we talked about with your hormones. And if you're deficient in something, that balance helps so much because I didn't have that balance, like mentally, physically, I mean, it was a disaster. I wasn't eating because I'm a vegetarian, so I wasn't eating the right food. I wasn't getting enough protein. So all of that changed. Now I'm like super consistent.

Hey there. Thank you so much for tuning into the Amberly Lago Show. I am really excited that you're here because the guest I have so been looking forward to having on and she is living proof that age doesn't limit us. It's actually it can set us free. So if you think it's too late to reinvent yourself or it's too late to have the confidence to go after your dreams. I want you to stay tuned because our guest is here to share with us so many tips, tools and strategies on how to live your most authentic, joyful, best life ever. I want to tell you a little bit about her. Sandra Lena Silverman is. She's a best selling author. She's got a new book that came out and working on her third book. She's a podcast host and someone who's redefining what it means to embrace life with confidence, curiosity and authenticity. She's walked runways of New York Fashion Week and Paris Fashion Week and she is just living proof that after 50 isn't the end of the story. It could be your best chapter is yet to come. So, Sandra, can I call you Sandy?

Yes.

Because we're friends too. We are friends.

Thank you for being here. Thank you, Everly.

I have been. Oh, I've been So excited to have you on the show. And we've just been talking so much before we hit record, I'm like, oh, yeah, we're doing a podcast here, so thank you so much for all that you share. And I, you know, I love your authenticity. There's so many people that try to hide relationship, you know, divorce, narcissism, even things that they've been through. And you are living proof that, like, you are authentic. You are a truth teller. And you just actually recently posted a video of your latest reconstructive surgery. And so before we get into that, because I was watching, I'm like, oh, man, let me tuck this up a little bit. I want to talk about how you have healed so much from the inside out, because how old were you when you started with your first? 27. And you did it for a different reason recently than you did it back then. Can you take us back to that time and the reason why?

So at 27, I was in a relationship. And we were in the relationship for about a year. That's when I started the surgery. A month into the relationship, he looked at me one day and just said, oh, your body's soft. You need to go to the gym. And I was like, okay, I guess mind my body soft, I'll go to the gym. Because at that point, I didn't. I wasn't looking at red flags or four red flags. I didn't understand narcissism. I didn't really. I was a young girl. I was 26 when I met him. So I just thought, okay, I've never even heard.

I didn't know what a narcissist was when I was that age.

Me neither.

Yeah.

So then fast forward. He would always talk about this ex that he had, and she had this amazing body and deuce eyes, breasts, and all these different things. So I guess subconsciously I thought, okay, well, my body's not good enough, you know, for this person, which is completely wrong. Like, I shouldn't have felt like that. And, you know, fast, like, moving forward now I don't feel like that. The procedures I've done, I do them for myself. But back then, I didn't love myself. So I was trying to always improve and didn't do the internal work later on.

But, you know, I hear you say I shouldn't have felt that way. But when you have never been treated that way and someone says something like that, someone that you love and you trust, that you believe in, and they tell you something, you kind of start thinking, well, it must be True. How can I fix this? How can I prove? Was there anything in your childhood where you felt like you had to prove yourself and maybe that's the reason you picked him? Or he wasn't like that and it wasn't like a month into the relationship, he began to treat you that way.

He began to treat me that way, but it was subtle. It didn't start getting really bad until I was pregnant with our son. So. And that was in two. Our son was born in 2003. Took my pregnancy as the biggest slap in his face that I gained weight. Like, he could not handle the weight gain. He just thought, oh, you're just letting yourself go. You're not eating healthy.

And you're like, let's see you carry a baby.

Because I was craving McDonald's and I was craving Krispy Kremes, and I really didn't want to work out, so I would handle it completely different today. But back then I gained 60 pounds and he just could not handle the weight gain. Like he was calling himself a whale watcher. He gave me a hard time after our son was born. So then a month later, I still have £40 to lose. So I lost 20 during the delivery. Even like a month later, I still had, you know, and one specific day I was going to New York to meet a friend for lunch and. And he looked at me and he's like, where are you going? And I said, oh, I'm going to meet my friend Ashu. We're going to have lunch in the city and we're going to get our eyebrows done. He looked at me and he said, eyebrows? I wouldn't be worried about my eyebrows. If I were you, I'd get to the gym because your eyebrows don't matter.

Wow.

At that moment, that's when I knew, like, okay, I'm in trouble. Like, this guy's just really, really mean. Like, I just had a baby. I'm trying to make myself feel better.

Yeah.

But from all the weight gain. And that's when I knew I was in trouble.

Yeah, Well, I mean, I've. I've definitely been there. I'll never forget a conversation I had with my ex husband. And at the time, I was, you know, I was 5 11, 118 pounds. And I remember finally looking at him and going, well, I'll never be fin enough for you, will I? And he said, no, you won't. Wow. At least he's admitting it. Wow. And there you go. What was. I know there are people that are probably listening that are in pain either Spouses or close friends, close family that are saying some things that aren't necessarily supportive or even nice, what's one thing that they can do to start to break that cycle of being treated that way?

The most important thing would be to eliminate the toxic people around you, Whether it's a friend, your significant other, a family member. You have to eliminate the toxic person. That's what I mean.

What if they're married to that person and they're like, well, I can't leave my husband. I don't work, I don't have the money. Or they say a million different things of why they can't. What could they do?

Asked, I guess, to go to some kind of counseling together. So a third party can actually, the significant other know that this is painful, this is hurtful, because maybe he doesn't realize, maybe he doesn't know. But coming from a third party, it's a little bit easier than you telling them. And then the third party can say, well, that wasn't very nice, what you said. This is how it affected her.

If they're willing to go.

If they're willing to go.

And I think it's really important to surround yourself with people who are going to lift you up, who are supportive. Because I know when I got out of my. Well, the first couple of relationships that I was ever in, I just felt I didn't realize how much I was slowly getting beat down. And one time I came back home from California, I came to Texas, and I got off the plane, and that was back when you could walk up to the gate and wait for people to get off the plane. And I got off the plane, and my mom looked at me and said, where did my Amberly go? Because I was a shell of myself. I mean, mentally, physically, spirit in every way. I slowly. Every bit of confidence had been chipped away. How did you start to regain confidence, heal yourself, and then step into the empowered woman that you are today?

The same thing that you're talking about happened to me. We moved to Miami 10 years ago. Over the years in Miami, when the behavior was really bad, I just started shaking. So my friends would see me, and they thought there was something neurologically wrong with me because I would shake all the time. Really, that's how bad it was. Once we separated for the fourth time, which was July. Actually. Before that, I started writing the book, or I decided to write the book the year before the book was written, Of 2024. We split up July of 2024. But the year before that, we were separated for five months. And that's when I decided to write the book because we weren't together. And I thought, you know what? I'm going to take this time to be productive.

Yeah.

And do something for me. Thank God that I did. Because during that separation, I was able to start writing the book. And then it was completed. I had started my Instagram posting videos from the book and gaining a following when he left. So I had that to focus on. So when he left for the fourth time, now I'm an author and, you know, I have all these good things happening.

So he kept leaving, you kept taking him back.

Yes.

And. But it just goes to show that just by not being around him.

Yes.

How you could use your energy to do something productive instead of constantly protecting yourself. It went from having to worry about, what is he going to say, what is he going to do to, oh, I can do something positive and put all my energy there.

And that's what it was. Exactly. Right. He was a vampire, so he was literally taking all my energy. And you're right. I was able to focus with him. Not in the picture.

Yeah. Yeah. It's amazing that. Just some of the things you can do to start empowering yourself. For me, one of the things that really started to help was working out and moving my body because I had just, you know, I was questioned when I would go to the gym or go for a walk. And I started going, I'm going to go to the gym and work out and feel better and get stronger. And the stronger that I got physically, it was weird. It was like the stronger I felt mentally, too. And so did you find that going out or going to the gym had a completely different meaning than it did from when you first met him?

I had a hard time working out in the relationship because there were so many times I was upset and I would just go to the gym and cry to my trainer, and she's so supportive. So my workouts, a lot of times weren't that great because I would be crying about a fight that we had or that. Because not only did he leave four different times, but he threatened to leave all the time. I mean, so many times he threatened to leave. I'm not happy. It was always the same conversation. I'm not happy. I want to leave. It was just really insane.

Yeah. Well, then leave.

Yeah, he did. So he finally left. Well, the last time I said, if you leave this time, we're done. I'm filing for a divorce. I'm never taking you back.

I bet he was shocked. Was he shocked?

I think so, yeah.

Well, good for you. For. Tell us the name of your first and second book. Can you tell us the third?

Yeah, I don't have a name for the third. So the first book is From Bullshit to Botox, and that is about reverse aging and timeless beauty. So that's my whole journey. Of all the external work that I did, that's the first part of the book. And the second part is the internal work, which should have been reversed. You do the internal work before you do the external work, which I didn't do then. The second book is From Bullshit to Broken Hearts. So that one is about my marriage, narcissism. Both books have experts in the book, like analyzing like the surgeries or talking about the procedures or narcissism. Whatever I talked about in the. In the second book, I have experts as well. But both books are pretty humorous. So even though they're, you know, the topics are a little serious, I find humor in it so hard to read.

Yeah, well, that's my kind of book. And now I love how open you are on social media talking about, you know, narcissism, relationships and. And just, you know, you being in your 50s. I'm in my 50s. And was there a time when you thought, wait a minute, just because I'm in my 50s doesn't mean life is over? Maybe this is the best part. Was there a turning point when you started to feel that way?

I started working with a life coach before our last separation. He was very helpful. He even had me change his name in my phone to Pain because he said, every time this person calls you, I want that word to show up. It says pain.

Really?

But when I started working with him, he was explaining about getting the toxic people out of my life. So I had eliminated toxic friendship.

So wait, wait, I thought you met him at first. So your ex, Your ex, you changed his name to Pain to Pain.

Now it's another name. Now it's Poppy, but I'll explain that in a second. So as Pain, my life coach, Peter, he was like, you need to change the name to Pain. So when he calls realize like he causes he's Pain.

Yeah, I love that.

Yeah, it was good. It was helpful.

Yeah. That is awesome. So he kind of started to help you.

He did. Because I realized after working with him that I don't deserve this. And if I don't really work on myself, which completely working on myself when we separated for the last time. And every person that I went out with was an extension of him, just different versions yeah. So finally, I had a guest on my show. Her name is Spicy Murray, and she has helped me so much. So I finally started working with her. She's a relationship coach.

That's incredible. Yeah. Because I was doing the same thing. I was thinking, why do I. I can go into any room and pick out the alcoholic or the narcissist or the one I'm going to be codependent with, like, I can just pick them out. And I was like, okay, I got a broken picker. And. And it was what it was. I had to look at me. What things that I never dealt with or healed.

Yes.

Why I was picking it. So that's amazing. And I love that you talk about having a coach and having a therapist or someone that can help you, because we don't do it. We don't. We aren't meant to go through hard things alone.

No.

And I mean, I got sober. I'm a sponsor. I have a sponsor. I have a sponsor. I've got a therapist. I've got a coach. I'm in a mastermind, and I have a mastermind. I think it's important that we don't do it alone. And when you can have somebody go, oh, my goodness, I so relate to you. I said, and that's one of the reasons I wanted to have you on is because everything that you shared about relationships and stuff that you've been through, I have, too. What would you say to someone who is in a relationship with a narcissist right now and how to break free from that?

It's so important to figure out a way to leave that person, because when they cross certain boundaries and you accept it, and I accepted for seven years, it never gets better. It continues. They get bolder and bolder. They get more mean. And I mean to the point. One day, he looked at me before we separated for the last time, and he was serious. He looked at me and said, what will it take for me to break you? Because he hadn't broken me yet. He literally looked at me and he's like, what would it take for me to break you? If you're with a narcissist, I suggest that you leave.

Yeah.

Because, I mean, you know, you experienced it yourself. Never gets better.

And it. It. I think it took me realizing it's never going to change.

Never.

It doesn't matter what I do, what I look like, what I say. Talking. We were talking about our friend Rebecca Zung before we started recording, and she was explaining to me that narcissists go after Women that are smart, that are attractive, that have it all together, they want that. They want someone. Did she talk to you about that?

Yeah, we talked about that.

It's. Wow.

No, they do they. And that they suck your energy. And it happened to both of us where we were a shawl of ourselves at the end.

Yeah. Well, you have done so much healing from the inside with a coach working on why you are choosing this kind of person, how to break free from it. But you've also done a lot of work now that you've done healing on the inside with your nutrition. I really believe it's mind, body, spirit, and especially as we get, you know, start to get a little older. You know, I'm in my 50s and I remember thinking, man, I used to not. I never had to worry about doing my hair. I didn't have any makeup or literally. I remember somebody came over one time and they're like, well, where's your makeup? I didn't have makeup. I think I had mascara. Now I've got, like, all the things that you see on TikTok. I'm a sucker. Buying that cream. Buying. I open up a drawer just for creams and eye patches and all the things taking care of myself, but also the blood work and just checking what nutrients. And I just did my. I don't know if you've done this, but I just recently did my first, you know, colonoscopy and endoscopy. It was not fun. The prep for that was not fun. But what they can see from just having those, I was like, they're telling me, oh, you're to the age you need to have that done. Thank goodness it came back. Okay. But you are very, you know, proactive in getting the blood work. What should someone do if they're 40, 50 years old, in your opinion, as far as, like, taking care of their health?

Number one, check your hormones. So many women don't do a test to test their hormones. So if their hormone levels are off, that could be the cause that you're the reason why you're holding on to so much weight. A lot of women don't even think about that. That's like the number one thing. Also micronutrients as well. So I don't just do like a basic. I go deeper with, like. Because you might be deficient in, like, something like selenium. That's not going to show up on a regular blood panel.

Okay.

So I do like a deeper.

So what do you ask? Do you. What kind of doctor do you go for a Holistic.

A functional medicine doctor can do that. I just. I just repeated my blood work recently and it actually came back really, really good for the first time. I don't know. My hormones were good. Even though I'm not on estrogen or progesterone. I'm not really. And my hormones this time around were so good. And even my vitamin D. So I'm not sure what happened, but I'm usually really low.

Could it be that you're in a happy relationship?

It must be. It must be that. It's because I have a new boyfriend and I'm happy. That must have something to do with it because my blood work has never come back like this. I'm always deficient in those things. And I try with the vitamin D, but this time around, the blood work was great.

Well, I think that, you know, people sometimes don't realize. I didn't realize even as much as how much you're affected by toxic people in your life or your own toxic behavior or your own decisions or habits that maybe aren't so healthy for you really affect you in so many ways. Like, I know for me, when I. I had a really. I was a little stressed last year. I had a lot going on, a lot of good things, but I didn't realize the stress on my body from traveling, from events to all the things that I was doing from a medical procedure that went wrong. And mine wasn't a fun one. It was a spinal stimulator I had done. I wish I could say it was a fun one, but it wasn't yet. And so it really does. So I'm sure that I think it's good to have that baseline, getting the levels, knowing what your hormones are, and going to a good doctor. What would you recommend for someone to do to find a good doctor?

I like to check reviews. So I would Google for your area and really check the reviews doctor that I've used.

And then you. I just recently because. So I was stalking you, by the way. And I recently heard you've had like

25 so many procedures. So I was in People magazine. They had written an article about all the procedures. I mean, it was so funny. And I think it was something like 25 a lot.

You are catching up to me, girl. I've had 34 on this leg, but

25 a lot, a lot of procedures. Most of them were great. There are two I regret. One was liposuction in my stomach and knee area. That was really bad. I took out way too much fat. I ended up having to Go back in with a tummy tuck to fix. And I never had to have a tummy tuck after I had my son. And then the other procedure was called a Y lift. So before I got my facelift, I went to New York and had this Y lift done where it's just filler that he uses, but so much filler to sculpt. He did a great job. He goes, like deep into the muscle. I repeated it two years later, and he pie faced me a year to get the filler out of my face. My face was blown up like this. No, it was crazy. And I don't even know why he didn't repeat the same thing that he had done. I just wanted, like, a little bit of lifting that also caused more sagging skin. And then I got the facelift. So you have to be very careful with fillers.

Wow. Wow. Well, I had filler one time. This is years ago. I had it here because my doctor was like, you know, you're getting those line. You might want to get pillow. I'm never. Well, I'd never say never, but I didn't do it again because it moved. And so when I smiled, there was like a line where it shouldn't have been. And so I went to him, I was like, hey, what is up with this line in my face now? He said, oh, well, we can do something to inject it, to dissolve it. And I was like, so you mean I paid for that, but now I'm going to have to pay to have it out? I said, you know what? I'm just going to leave my face alone. I'm scared. I'm going to leave alone and let it dissolve on its own. So, yeah, that kind of stuff scares me. And I have to admit, like, yeah, I look and I'm like, ooh, little nip tuck here would be nice. But it really scares me to death, I think, because I've had so many surgeries, the idea of going under anesthesia again, of just having something done to your face, how long did it take for that to get better when you had that?

I looked so bad for a year. I.

How did you handle that mentally?

I was just completely distraught. So I kept going to the dermatologist, not him, a different one, to remove what you're talking about. And it's very painful to remove the filler. It's very. So I had to get so many injections and because there he put so much in that it was just so thick and it had migrated exactly what you're saying. It was a Disaster. And then finally getting all the filler out, my face sagged so much that I had to do the facelift.

Oh, my goodness.

Which I should have done to begin with because I wanted to, and my mom talked me out of it. And then I see this guy on Good Morning America doing the procedure, the Y lift. So I thought, okay, he's my guy. I'm going to go. I set up an appointment with him. I go to New York. And it was great the first time, but the second time was not so good.

Oh, my goodness. Well, tell us the difference in, like, how somebody knows whether they're doing some medical procedures for someone else or for themselves. How can you distinguish between the two for people?

I think that if you really love yourself and you want to make these improvements, it's great. But if you're doing it because your significant other is telling you, oh, you're not good enough, or I don't like this. I want larger breasts. I want you to get a BBL or whatever it is, and you're doing it for them, that's definitely the wrong reason. You have to do it for yourself, and you have to do it because you want to make yourself feel better for you, not for somebody else.

Well, what is a bpl?

Brazilian Butt Lift. Oh.

I was like, what is a bpl? Oh, yes.

Because a lot of husbands, they look at their wives and they want them, you know, to look different. They want them to be enhanced or whatever it is. I mean, some are the opposite where they don't want you to do anything. It just depends.

Yeah, I'm lucky. My husband is like, oh, man, no, don't mess with your face. Don't mess with. Which is scary. So, yeah, I mean, hey, look. And he. I did not love myself with all these scars. I hated the way I was disgusted with the way I looked. I had no self confidence. And he actually loved me until I could learn. He loved my scars until I could love them.

That's so amazing.

I'm lucky. I mean, look, we're not perfect by any means. Let me tell you. He can get. He can be a booger, but he's a good man and he loves me. And I'm. I know how. What a blessing that is because I've had the opposite. So what do you. What advice would you give to someone who feels stuck in their situation to. They want to improve their self. Maybe it's not just physical. Maybe they want to improve themselves and how they feel, feel emotionally, mentally and physically. What's the first step they could do to take to get unstuck.

I would say try to find a life coach, a spiritual healer, Reiki, anything that you can do to make yourself, you know, feel better and have like an outside person help you. If you don't want a therapist, then try a spiritual healer or life coach. Try to do things for yourself, like take time for yourself because a lot of people don't. They're busy with their kids, they're busy with work, and they don't take extra time for theirself. Everybody needs to have time for themselves. The right amount of sleep is helpful and also making sure that you're completely balanced like we talked about with your hormones. If you're deficient in something, balance helps so much. Because I didn't have that balance, like mentally, physically. I mean, it was a disaster. I wasn't eating because I'm a vegetarian. So I wasn't eating the right food. I wasn't getting enough protein. So all that changed. Now I'm like super consistent.

Do you have some morning rituals or daily rituals that you're consistent with no matter what? Because I mean, thank you for flying in here all the way from Cabo. Now you're jet setting across the country. Again, do you have daily rituals that you are, you know, they're not your non negotiables.

So every morning. So in Miami, I have a bodywork person that works on the fascia. And so I see him twice a week. So that's early in the morning, twice a week. And then I go to the gym. Really? I don't know if you. It's kind of like roughing. It's connected.

That's amazing.

Tissue work. That's been helpful. And then I go to the gym the same time every day. If I'm traveling, I'm with her the same time on FaceTime. So if I'm traveling, I'm still with my trainer in a gym. If I'm in a location where there isn't a gym, I bring weighted bands with me. So I keep that consistency. Because if you skip a week of working out, a lot happens in a week, two weeks for sure. You lose muscle, that sort of thing.

I lose my mind.

Yeah. And you're not like in your routine. So no matter where I am, I'm with her. So it's either at the gym with her or traveling with her. Consume 70 grams of protein while I'm at the gym. So I'm there for two hours and

you're at the gym for two hours.

One hour is working out and the second hour is lymphatic work that we do.

Oh, my gosh.

Now I don't do the lymphatic work, obviously, when I'm traveling and I'm not with her, but I'm still with her at the gym or working out. Because I'm a vegetarian, I have to particular shake that's 40 grams of protein. That helps so much. And then she gets these protein donuts delivered to the gym that are 30 grams. So that's 70 grams done. Right. Then I usually eat eggs after that, which is another like 20 some grams. So I'm getting like 100 grams a day. It's harder when I'm traveling, but when I'm there, when I'm in Miami, that's what it's really helpful.

So you're vegetarian, but you will do eggs?

Yes.

Okay.

Eggs and dairy.

Okay. Like, my daughter, my oldest daughter was a vegetarian. She wouldn't do any. No eggs. Milk? No. Yeah. And then she became pescatarian, so she would have to, you know, because she. It's. It's a lot. It's a lot of learning and how to do it the right way. When you're a vegan or vegetarian, I

would have a really hard time being vegan because I know I wouldn't get enough protein. Yeah, I need the eggs because even the protein donuts are made out of egg whites. So without eggs, I'm not sure I could survive.

Well, you're making me want a donut. Well, that. That takes some discipline for sure, to do those things. But what helps you stay disciplined? What helps you set? Because I don't rely on motivation. Motivation goes. I have to rely on my discipline. What helps you stay disciplined?

I've learned when I'm consistent, I'm happy. When I'm not consistent with my supplements. I don't take a lot of supplements, but I'm religious about my peptides. I inject NAD every other day, which has helped with my energy level. And a vitamin injection, that's a Myers cocktail with glutathione and magnesium, and that helps too. Wow.

So you're into the peptides. That's so. There's just so many mixed things about peptides. So I tried peptides for a little bit. I didn't really feel any difference. And let me tell you, it was scary the first time. I was like, let me poke myself. And my husband was like, oh, my gosh. Seriously, Amberly, you've had so many surgeries and you're scared of a little needle? And so I got used to it. But I didn't. Then my husband became like. So in. Like, in to researching. Staying up all night researching. He's like. And then talked to a family friend of ours who was a doctor who was like. And actually Dr. Dubrow was like, stay away from it. We don't know what's going to come of it. There's so much like, do it, don't do it. So how did. How long have you been doing peptides?

Since 2017. Oh, a long time.

Oh, wow. So now it's all over the.

Yeah, all over. So I've been doing it for a very long time and I haven't had any issues. It's been almost 10 years.

And so you do the NAD and the Myers cocktail.

The NAD every other day. That's subcutaneous. The Myers cocktail, which I need, because I need all the bees. The.

I've done that. The Ivy.

Yeah.

So these really help.

Yeah. I can't do IVs because I have problems with my lymphatic. So my face swells when I really do, because I've done that before where I've consistently had an IV bag one week or for one month, every week, and my face just blew up. Really? And I think it's because of all the surgeries. I think it messed with my lymphatic system.

Oh.

That's why now I try not to go under anesthesia. So the facelift that I just gotten, I was just. I was awake.

Yes. You have to go and see Instagram because she shows this surgery. If you've ever been curious about having a facelift, she is having this done while she's awake. So go check her out. Tell them your Instagram handle.

It's Sandra Lena Sulferman. Yeah.

And so was it that scary for you?

No, because I've done so many. I don't get scared. And I trust the doctor. He had two friends that went to him as well.

Oh, okay.

And I wanted to find somebody that would just do the local anesthesia. So I'm wide awake. I. It was invasive, but not super invasive because he cut the excess skin that I had, but also lifted the muscle with surgical threads. Not PDO threads, but surgical threads. So it's not going to last. But the facelifts don't last anyway, so you can go in for a deep plain facelift and it's not going to last. It'll last. The doctor will tell you 10 to 15 years.

Thank you for sharing that. That is very important because I think a lot of times you think, oh, if I go get breast augmentation. Well, you're going to have to have surgery in 10 years to replace those implants. If I have to have a, you know, going to go get a facelift and I'm done. I'm thankful for sharing that, that you're going to have to have it done again within 10 to 15 years.

That's why chose this doctor for the procedure that he does because it lasts three to five years and I'm fine. I'll just go in through the same incisions and repeat it because they don't last anyway.

Wow.

So.

So are you able to share that doctor's info?

So he's in Bogota. He's in Columbia, and his name is Dr. William Wara.

So I guess we're going to Columbia. Ladies. Well, I want to know where can people find your books? Your first book, your second book, and your third book that will be coming out soon.

So Amazon. So the first book is on Amazon and Barnes and Noble. The second book is being released in September. The third book, I don't have a name yet, so that's more of an empowerment books that I'm working on.

Okay, well, I will make sure to have that in the show notes. But let's real quick do a lightning round. I want to ask you just a few questions. First thing that pops into your head. What's a myth about aging you would like to completely erase?

You should wait until you're past 50 or 60 to get a facelift.

Oh, okay. Well, I missed the mark on that. Coffee or champagne?

Neither.

Neither. Oh, I like that. What's one beauty product you can't live without?

The moisturizer from Play to pull.

Okay, I'll buy that because you look beautiful. What's one wellness habit that has completely changed your life?

Mm.

I love it. One word that describes this season of your life. Well, you smile. If y'. All. If y' all are listening, you. You have to look at face or Facebook or YouTube and just see how big that you just smiled. Yeah, I got. Were you thinking about your boyfriend just then? I could tell. Finish this sentence. Confidence is.

Confidence is something that you can't live without.

Oh, powerful. And I guess what's bringing you the most joy right now,

internally, I just feel amazing, honestly.

Well, you look amazing and it shows. You're glowing from the inside out. So thank you so much for flying in, for being here on the show and sharing tips on just how to step into your power, get rid of the narcissist, and also your beauty secrets. And thank you for being here.

Thank you for having me. This has been amazing.

Oh, my gosh. You're amazing. Thank you. And I'll have to go visit you in Miami. And thank you so much for tuning into the show. I appreciate you tuning in, listening, and if you found value in this episode, please share it with a friend. Especially if you have a female friend that is thinking about kicking the narcissist to the curb or having some procedures done. Anyway, thank you for being here. And until next time, keep sparking joy and being unstoppable.