From FEAR to CAREER with Bryan Mineo

So before we get started, I want to say thank you so much for being here and happy 2020. And this is it, y'.

All.

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Welcome to True Grit and Grace, a podcast designed to empower you to claim your resilience and thrive through life's challenges. I am Amberly Lago, a mindset coach, fitness expert, and best selling author. Each week I'll dive deep with the world's brightest thought leaders and elite performers to share tangible tools and practical advice to inspire you to keep your eyes on the prize and and forge ahead. So get ready to conquer your fears, heal any trauma, lead with your heart, and elevate your life with grit and grace. Hi there. I am here with someone really special, Brian Maneo. I'm so excited to be here with you. We are actually sitting, sitting in my truck. It's a great little office space.

It's not that weird to me. So my podcast studio in quotes office is my laundry room. So this is not, this is not even like the most unorthodox of settings for me. So we got a cozy truck. It reminds me of Texas, so I feel very at Home, actually, it kind

of smells like a barn. So you feel right at home.

Better than my car.

Well, I have been excited to talk to you. I wanted to share your message and all you're doing because you're doing some amazing things. You're the founder of smog.

Yeah.

And you are the founder of the Swim Mechanic. And I'm going to get in the ocean with you one of these days.

That's what I've been waiting for because we've been scheduling this hangout even beyond the podcast. And there's probably something there. There's probably a reason why we haven't quite gotten the ocean yet, which makes you want to do it that much more, you know?

Yeah, yeah. Well, we'll get to that. We will get to that when we have been talking. And I love everything that you're doing because your main purpose is to really teach people how to overcome their fear of the ocean. But in the whole process, you have really built this amazing community. And I know that you started in a lake in Texas, but now you are all across the United States. And so I really want to talk to people about a few things. How you strengthen your resilience, how you do it all because you have a family, you're this leader of all these groups and you run a business. And so I want to talk about that and talk about how it got started. But first, can you tell everybody what exactly SMOG is?

Yeah. So. And I'll look forward to kind of reverse engineering this and telling the chronology of it. But SMOG is simply an open water community. And I always say the three tenants are service community and then swimming. Swimming really being like the distant third of those three, believe it or not, we happen to swim.

Yeah.

But what we do, we empower each other and we connect on the beach or if it's in a lake, it's in the park there. And help you overcome fear, to be seen and to really step into whatever it is that's holding them back. And I say this in these kind of grandiose words. Not everyone realizes that's what they're getting. A lot of people are training for triathlon or they want to get fit. They've got a bucket list goal and they come to get fit. But in the process, that's when they get all this other stuff along the way.

They get these bonuses of getting to meet and create relationships and have support. That's exactly who are most of the people that come to meet on Gosh,

it's the whole spectrum. So I think I was mentioning to you earlier, we have a seven year old girl in this group in LA that was just coaching about two hours ago. We have an 82 year old man who's doing 100 Ironman.

Wow.

We have everyone in between people on weight loss challenges.

82 and he's done 100 Ironman.

Isn't that crazy? And he started at like 40. Wow. Pretty wild. So it's for anybody. It really is for anybody. Like you don't even have to swim. I don't even care if you want to come and just stay on the beach the whole time. Community is really like the imperative word. And what I've found, and I'll tell more of my story, is that that's what we all need the most of. We need to be seen, we need to connect, we need to be empowered by each other. And if you happen to do something great for your bodies as well, like swimming, even better.

Yeah, a community. I have this thing method that I use and it's an acronym called pacer and I use it every day. It's a kind of a key word to remind me that I am, I have the ability to strengthen my resilience. And one of the letters in PACER is community. And when I talk about it, I always say that community may be the most important part of pacer. Because for me, I grew up in Texas and I grew up like, you know, well, I've got to take care of myself. If I want something, I got to work hard for it and I have to do it on my own. And I'm going to look weak if I don't do it by myself. And so I really had a hard time reaching out for help. And I realized through a lot of my struggles that once I finally, you know, had the courage to ask for help, I started developing strength through my vulnerability because I connected with other people in a community. And this community of people has been really what has gotten me through my darkest times. Yeah, really. And so I love that you have created a community and whether you're young or old, you create a place that people feel like they belong, that they're a part of something and bigger than themselves, like they're a part of something, a movement, that's it.

And I think the people show up and they start to realize that we're all pretty similar and we all deserve the same and you know, we all are worthy of the same. So people start showing up and yeah, they're getting fitter, they're having fun, they're starting their weekend on A really good note. They're on fire the rest of the weekend and it's kind of infectious and they want more of this. So in creating this, I made it a year round program. So this case in la, every Saturday of the year is smog. So year round, 52 weeks out of the year, people are showing up for this group swim and.

Wow. So you show up every Saturday.

Yeah. And so my.

You're amazing.

And by the way, I live in San Diego now, So I lead three of the communities, three of the 10 communities in San Diego, in Orange County, Newport area, and then in Redondo beach here in la. And the only reason why it's worked, I believe, is the consistency. Year one, it's not like people were throwing money at me on the beach and they were fired up to see this group that was formed. It was a really slow growth, maybe 10, 12 people by the end of the day, calendar year. But I just kept showing up, I kept showing up and I believe that that's what's necessary to overcome fear, to really acclimate to the ocean. Because throughout the year the conditions change, the temperatures change. So it's not a seasonal thing. And it just keeps getting better. And like the teacher in the ocean keeps revealing more and more and I mean, it's a lifelong thing and it's a life sport like swimming is one of the few things that most people could do their entire life feasibly.

Yeah.

Unlike a lot of other sports.

Yeah, well, yeah, I want to jump back to what you said about consistency because I think that is key not just in overcoming your fears or being a better swimmer or becoming an athlete, but I think it's key into being successful in all aspects of your life. So do you find that when people are doing this and they're being consistent with showing up and meeting you here, finding that they are being more consistent in other areas of their life?

Absolutely. Because kind of the point I was making, I didn't really elaborate on as far as it being Saturday morning. They're making the conscious choice probably on Friday for that matter. So Friday night looks different. They're probably not going to go out and maybe go to a party or even stay up late for that matter. So then they're kind of trimming back the excess on their Fridays in a healthy way. Saturday they wake up early, they're on it. They're doing something healthy for themselves, socially, intellectually, physically. So I think it does start to spill over in other facets of their life where it's like, okay, this is pretty cool. I want to start a community at my work. Like, can I start like a kickball league or whatever it is. I see people finding that there's a lot of simplicity in this and it's just creating the ability again to be seen. So people show up and they're going to be happy to see you, whatever that is that you're doing. Yet it doesn't exist many places.

Wow. Kudos to you for showing up and showing up consistently. And that's something that I think people need to hear that, you know, a lot of times success looks easy, especially on social media. It looks like, oh, well, they overcame this and now they are, you know, leading all these people or they're a speaker or they wrote a book and now look, it's a bestseller. All these different things that people accomplish and they don't see the behind the scenes, how much work goes into it. And it's about being consistent and showing up and continuing to show up when it's hard or sometimes you don't feel like it. And so that is what makes success right there.

You're right. Like the whole like overnight success, I feel like is a total farce.

Yeah.

Like no one wakes up the next day after thinking of an idea and it just pops. And also similar to like someone saying they're self made, I think that's a far, like, oh, there's a strong team behind any person. And I think that's where this works because we are, again, we're a community. We're lifting each other up. And I didn't create this. I'm one person out of the couple thousand now.

Well, but you know what? Okay, I'm gonna stop you. Right?

Oh, I like it. All right, I see where this is going.

You are being really humble right now because you're a badass. You have done so much with this. You have really, you started this. This whole idea came. I mean, you've been in the fitness and wellness industry or for years and you started this with your company, your Moneo Athletics. And it started in a lake in Texas. And growing up in Texas, I know about those lakes and they're gross.

Okay. Yeah, like I should have been paying those people to go into lakes. Like they were paying me money somehow.

Yeah, it's crazy. Those legs. And you went from that because of your dedication and consistency. And I really feel like it's because of your passion behind it. You have managed to get people on board because your passion and your positivity is contagious. And it really. People want to be around you, and they want to look. It's not often that I'm like, yeah, I want to get in the ocean and swim. And I was like, I met you. I'm like, yeah, I want to get in the ocean and swim.

Yeah, yeah. Because it's fun. And smog shows that it can be fun, it can be safe, it can be empowering. So without getting too wordy, I'll tell you kind of my story, because my passion actually came from fear, and it's kind of cheesy, but my catchphrase in my head always is, I went from fear to career. I turned my fear into my career. And I don't know that that's the answer for everybody, that whatever your fear is, that maybe has the power to become your career. But I do think that it is kind of a portal that unlocks a lot of things for you that will probably shape how you approach your career and your life. So, for me, I grew up a swimmer in the pool in Texas. And, you know, that's great. Years up through high school was not super competitive. I enjoyed the water. I had never been in the open water, and When I was 18, I went in the open water with someone training for triathlon, and I was supposed to be coaching them because they thought they knew I was a swimmer, and I thought I was going to impress them by being their coach or whatever. We get out there. It was Easter Sunday, and Easter in Texas is still pretty cold. Super ominous, dark. It was, like, almost about to rain. Sort of feeling. You can kind of see the picture painted. No one's fishing out there. It's quiet. The lake is empty. It's kind of eerie. We get out there, they take off. And I guess at this point, I realized I'm like, okay. I don't actually know what I'm doing. I've been in the pool countless hours. The kind of 10x thing done the 10,000 hours in the pool, get in the open water, start swimming out maybe 25 yards offshore. And I'm panicking. Like, my mind's starting to spin out. They're way ahead of me. And they look back and kind of like, gesture, are you okay? And I'm like, yeah, I'm okay. I'm okay. And I wasn't okay. I get another 25 yards in. I'm swallowing water. There's a little bit of chop on the surface from the wind. And mentally, at that point, I convinced myself that I couldn't do it. I knew that I couldn't do it, which wasn't true, but your mind is that powerful. I literally convinced myself that I wasn't going to be able to do this. So they swam back to me. And I remember mouthing the words just breathe, saying just breathe to me. And that was the first time I'd thought about my breath. It's like, oh, breathe. Regained my breath, Swam to maybe 50 yards back to shore, which is like a minute in swimming time, and kind of hung my head in shame. And this was the first time I had found that word, really. And I had a definition of what fear was. And the most humbling piece is that my identity was swimming, yet that was the place I was finding my fear. And it baffled me. And I drove home 30 minutes from that lake grapevine that night and just. I was embarrassed. I was shocked. I knew there was work to be done. And I definitely did not have the foresight to really know what that work was, that it was significant, which it became very significant. So the next day was Monday, and I drove straight from school to this lake. And my plan was really no plan. I was gonna get in the water and try to overcome this fear.

Oh, wow. Well, good for you. Because a lot of people would have just been like, I am never doing that again. What was it in you that made you think? Was that just like something that was in you?

I think so. I think it was more of, at that age, an impressionable. I was just 18 years old. You're self conscious. And I think I was so self conscious about how embarrassed I was that I didn't want to feel that again. And I knew there was something there to be learned. And so I went there, really with no plan. And day one was me waist deep in the water, just walking through and re going through that entire thing in my head. I did not go back to that because I went back on Wednesday. So day two was Wednesday. I kind of advanced off of that by maybe submerging up and down, really. And I just created this methodologist progression that I kind of teach today to some degree. And again, this was not like I didn't have this aha moment, like, oh, this is my calling. This is my career. I was just trying to survive and overcome this fear. So my point, this whole thing, is that I kept it a secret. I was ashamed. I was embarrassed. And if I would have had one person, much less a community of people to make me feel safe, to make me feel like it's okay and it's acceptable, I could have fast tracked the whole thing. And actually maybe this wouldn't even happen in the first place.

Wow.

So I think a lot of people see me and they see I have all these photos of me in the ocean, and I'm in the ocean every day, but I wasn't always like this stud swimmer I saw.

And you know what? Your pictures are beautiful. Seriously, you have to check out the photography on the swim mechanic on Instagram. It's the swim mechanic.

Yeah.

Oh, my gosh. Every picture should be poster sized. Beautiful pictures. But I love that you have the courage to share, especially as a studly man, have the courage to share that it wasn't always that way, that you were scared, that you had this fear. And because there's not a lot of guys, especially that are strong and athletic that would admit that.

That's true.

And I think there's so many people that actually feel that way.

Yep. You know what I love now in creating smog and creating that sort of safe space? I love when I get like this super high level exec or the CEO coming to smog, and I get to see them in their most vulnerable moment of the week, where at work, they're the ones barking out their orders, per se, or they're the ones that are to be really recognized. They come to smog and they're vulnerable. And I love that they're one step into that. And two, that it's humanizing. It's like, okay, he's the same as me. He might be making a million bucks a year, making big decisions, bigger than I can ever imagine, but he's in the same place as us. So that's the whole melting pot of this community, is that it's everybody. So we're all equal. And again, we realize, like, okay, I guess this human experience is pretty similar. It might express itself in different ways, different people, but we all need and crave the same, like, innate, very simple things, like community.

Yeah. I actually had a client of mine years ago. She grew up in California, in la. And I was going paddleboarding and I invited her to go paddle boarding with me. And now she's young. She's like in her 20s. And to me, that's young. It is. And took her paddleboarding. And I have so much respect for her because when I asked her to go, I had no idea she had never been in the open water.

Whoa.

Not only had she never been paddleboarding, she had never been in open water. And she was willing to trust me enough to go paddleboarding. And not that I am an expert paddle boarder by any means. I went with a group of people went out, but she was so scared to fall in the water. She was the only person that stayed on top of that paddleboard.

We all.

Everyone else fell in the water. She was the only one. She was like, I am not falling in that water. I am staying on.

Toes are clenching the board.

Yes.

That's awesome. Wow.

Yeah. But it was the first time that I kind of experienced see somebody that was. Had that fear of the open water. Because I'm not a very good swimmer, but I don't have a fear of the open water. I saw that day we were out paddle boarding. There was a school of dolphins in front of us. And I'm the kind of person that I was like, oh, cool, dolphins. And I, like, was trying to paddle as fast as I could to get out to those dolphins. But it gave a new perspective of people that do have a fear of being in the open water, which is.

Honestly, I don't have a stat on this, but I would guess more than half the population easily. I wasn't asking you is did you guys feel, like, any bit of bond after that together?

Yeah, Like, I've always felt really close and connected with her. Like, I always kind of took her under my wing. She was a client and kind of took her under my wing as, like, more than a client, like a daughter. To me, she's a sweetheart. And after that, that's an experience that we both will never forget. You know, she's moved on. She's gone. She lives in San Diego now. But we always have that experience that I feel like brought us closer. And I think there is. What I have found is in the community of people that I have, especially those that live with chronic pain, because I live with chronic pain every day. And those people that have chronic pain and we've bonded and we understand what it's like, and I feel somewhat like a brotherhood or sisterhood with those people, because we get it on a different level and I think important. And I think that there have been many occasions when, you know, I've had a bad day with pain, or they've had a bad day and they have some pain that's been, you know, really escalated, that we can connect and talk, and then we feel like we can move through it and move forward.

Right. You know, that's very cool. So as far as the open water goes, what I've found, I think the gold in the group being based in the open water is the dynamic nature of the open water. And because it's a blue planet, so water is everywhere. We're surrounded and we're affected by it day to day. And I think a lot of people are unconscious of that in California. I think it's obvious we pay a lot of money to live on the coast because of the ocean. And we're pretty aware of that.

Yeah.

But right. It's like, okay, that's how we justify.

Well, we live by the ocean.

Yeah. Rent's five grand a month. It's because, oh, I live near the ocean. So I think the problem or the bummer I see is that most people aren't getting in the ocean. And I think it's okay. There's still some connection to the ocean that's powerful, that can be done on land. But until you get in that, the lessons haven't been learned yet. They haven't even been revealed yet. Because the ocean's different every moment. Of course, every day of the year, the seasons change with different temperatures. That's I think really the gold in this is that we're going through something different every single time. So it's never like this template that we show up and know, okay, this is what we're going to experience or this is our challenge or obstacle today. There's no way to predict that.

I love that. And you know, for me, the ocean, you know, especially since I moved to California and I was able to go to the ocean. But anytime I feel like I really need to do some healing emotionally or if I have a big decision to make or if I just need to pause in life, I always go to the ocean. And even when I can't make it to the ocean, I actually have an app on my phone and every night I go to bed with the sound of the ocean. That's how I can fall asleep.

I love it. We do that with our baby.

You do.

And so I've got that on my Spotify and I'll hop my car and the Bluetooth picks up the Spotify. I'll find myself listening to the ocean sounds while I'm driving for 20, 30 minutes. I'm like, oh, like kind of snap out, like, whoa. Because it's so relaxing.

It is. It really calms my mind. And so I found that that is how I go to sleep. That's how I can shut off my mind a little bit in a more. You know, because there's so many people that are stressed out out there that try to go to sleep or calm themselves down. You know, there are people out there that are hooked on taking, you know, sleeping pills or anti anxiety medication when they can Meditate or listen to the ocean or do things like start swimming with you on Saturdays to start their week off in the right way.

Yep. And the ocean is very meditative in a lot of ways. Like there's a very strong breath component to that, which I do teach a lot of. And there's nothing more present than being in the ocean.

Yeah.

As a literal means of survival, you have to be present.

Yeah.

Your mind can't wander when you're out there.

And that is really one of my ultimate goals, is to be more present because I feel like we can get so caught up. For me, anyway, I can get caught up and oh, I have this event coming up. Oh, I have to do this, I

have to do this. And you've got your phone in front of you and you're scrolling stuff constantly. Yeah, that's been a teacher of mine that's. I've been reminded constantly recently because of our daughter. She's six months old almost. And if I have the phone in my hand and she's in my lap, let's say she's like a magnet drawn to the phone. I'm like, oh my gosh, put that down, put it down. And I don't want her memories of me as she's getting older to be me distracted. Me distracted by my phone and not present with her. And that didn't exist when we were kids, of course. And it's tough not to get caught up in that. I'm totally guilty of that too.

It really is. And I'm grateful. You know, I have an 11 year old and she's just starting to get into the social media a little bit. She just started elementary school and I'm trying my best to set an example of not always being on the phone. But it's hard when you're running a business and so much everything is happening so fast, you know. How often do you get in the ocean for yourself for a workout?

Yeah, not very often. I know we've kind of talked about that and it's probably similar to a massage therapist is probably not going to give their partner a massage at the end of the day or like a personal trainer like yourself. And I've been a personal trainer. You're probably not going to spend a lot of time at the end of the day of training people to do your own workout. I'm guilty of that. But at the same time, I'm very happy with my balance, with my time in the water and how I'm feeding myself because I get to be in the ocean 34 hours most days with clients, whether it's on a paddle board or a surfboard or in the water or on the beach. And that totally fills my cup. I think that's awesome. Where I am right now, racing is a low priority. I've never been super competitive in that regard. I don't think I have anything to prove with my fitness in that sense. So I'm really happy. I might do my own once, twice a week, which might sound shocking for someone who thinks on social media. They know me. I'm in the water a ton.

Yeah.

And it's just my home, you know? And I almost have separated from even the word workout when it comes to the ocean. Just like I just like to move in the water. I don't even know what you want to call it, but I guess some of those are workouts. I don't know.

Well, do you believe that we can have kind of work life, family balance? Do you believe in that?

Gosh, I struggle with that one. Like that phrase, work life balance, it suggests that we're not doing something right. It suggests that there is a right way to do it. Yeah, I don't believe. I don't care for that. I guess because something's gonna work for you, it might not and probably won't work for me. So maybe the barometer should be more of, like, happiness. So if you're not. Yeah. If your cup's not totally full, if you're not totally happy, then you wanna maybe rearrange some things or look a little closer. Why is that? But I try not to be like, you know, I need to spend more time on my fitness. I'm so much more focused on my business right now. I just keep my attention on the things that are feeding me the most right now. And that's kind of as simple as I try to do it.

Yeah, I like that. I don't really ever think there is a balance. I think it's chaotic and crazy. What I do is I just really try to focus on priorities and making sure my priorities are straight. For me, family comes first, and then everything falls into place. And I try to make sure that, you know, I feed my heart and soul, but I have to put my family first. And, I mean, I come from. I had a marriage before that failed, and it was like we didn't have the same priorities. And I think that's something I had to take a look at. But, yeah, life gets kind of crazy and chaotic. And I like that you said you have to focus on what's feeding you.

That's it.

Yeah.

And that's always evolving. And as you can imagine, as a new father right now, I'm on fire, and I'm really happy.

And you're. She's so beautiful. Your daughter is so sweet.

I mean, I have a hard time ever saying no to her.

Oh, yeah, get ready.

She's just the sweetest thing ever. And I'm in this new chapter of my life. And so your question, work, life, balance really resonates now. So I almost don't care. I'm like, you know what? I'm doing everything to create the best family, the best marriage. Me as a man feeling fulfilled and happy. I think I'm doing pretty well with that. And I've never gone this deep into stuff, and I'm reworking a little bit on some things, looking backwards on the why I am here, why I am the way I am, and I've revealed a lot of stuff, and it's been humbling. I think the timeliness is because of my daughter coming to the world. And before she came into the world, I think I was just sort of a reality check. I'm like, well, this is where I am. This is where I want to be for her and for us.

I think that for me, I get asked a lot, what is your biggest inspiration? For me, my biggest inspiration comes from my children. They're why I do a lot of things. They're why I decided to be resilient. They're why I decided not to give up. They're why I try my best to set a good example. And I think that when you have, you know, you had your daughter, it's like, it puts things in perspective of what's important, whether or not you're going to continue doing something. If not.

Yeah, right. And this is not me being like, everyone should be having kids. Although I do think it's pretty awesome. Yeah, Consider it. Yeah. Have some babies. But it's finding out why and the why for me. I don't know why it was never super clear to me. And I'm not saying I aimlessly traveled through the world, but I was living for my heart always. But always searching for my mark. And what was my offering, my gift, like, my purpose? Certainly stepped into that role the past five years or so. But when the baby came along, it wasn't a decision. It was an unconscious thing that I had to really, really approach and go into full steam ahead. Yeah, it's been the best year that, I mean, since my wife is pregnant to Now, I guess 15 months. It's been the best. It's crazy.

Yeah. I think I just told my husband day before yesterday, and I was telling my daughter it was the best time of my life. And I know there will be more fun times to come, and I look forward to that, but it is such a magical time. We were talking before we started the podcast, and I was telling you how we didn't think that doctors told my husband and I that we weren't going to be able to have a baby. And when I got pregnant, it was such a gift, and I appreciated that so much. The fact that, you know, I kind of mourned the fact that we weren't able to have a baby. And then, you know. But everybody's different. I'm not saying everybody should have a baby, but it is, because it's not always easy, believe me. You know, I've had one that's getting out of that phase. She went through the phase. She's 24 in a couple of days, and I went through that where I felt like she was replaced with an alien. I thought, where did my sweet angel baby go? She's a teenager now, and I'm starting to approach that time with my youngest now.

I won't be ready for that either.

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. It's a challenging time, but our kids teach us a lot about ourselves and about other things as well. There's one thing that I do like to ask everybody on my podcast. What is resilience to you, and how do you tap into your resilience?

So resilience, to me, the only way to have resilience and to become more resilient, I believe, is being present in the moment because of the infinite variables and distractions around us. I always say, limit your distractions. Be present in this moment, not looking either direction forward or behind. And that's going to provide you the answers you need in that moment.

I love that.

And then you always see you can handle whatever it is that you're approaching. You always have more than enough. Yeah, but I think we let ourselves get distracted by different things, Whether it's the voice in your head or someone else's literal voice that breaks you down. And that can start to convince you in a patterned way that you aren't able or you aren't capable or enough.

What do you do? Do you ever have those voices that come up that say, you're not enough? Or what were you thinking? What do you think you can do this? What do you do if you have one of those? Because I get that all the Time where I get that negative self talk and they just want to have a party up in my head. What do you do to shut that off?

Yeah, I have that a lot too. My self critic is loud and present. I go to my breath. So breath work for me. And I might be misusing the term breath work. Breath work for me is literally breathing and just listening and tuning into my breath. Same thing I do to help you overcome fear of the ocean is literally listen to the rise and fall, the inhale, exhale, just, just paying attention to that. Everything else is blocked out. All the noise. Negative self talk goes away. Our brain can focus on one thing at a time. So I go to my breath in those times if I'm stressed, if I'm feeling bad about myself or unconfident, I go to my breath and you kind of feel your shoulders relax and I feel a little bit at ease. It's like, ah, okay. It's not as bad as I maybe thought it was. Or it's not as do or die as I thought it was.

I love that. Actually last night I got into bed, I had a big day. Yesterday I had a big event. And you know, in California we have a lot of traffic. So I had spent like five and a half hours on the road that day in traffic. And when I got in bed last night, my body was tight and I realized I was taking these short, shallow breaths and my body, my whole nervous system was just shot and I focused on my breath and. And it made such a difference. So I love that that is something that anybody can do starting right now is just to focus on their breathing. So whether they're listening to this podcast in their car and they're driving in traffic, or they're listening in their house or they're, you know, whatever they're struggling with, or in the future, if they're struggling with that inner critic telling them they can breathe through it.

That's it. Well, and I told the story earlier about my first finding the fear in the lake, and the person said, just breathe. And I've kind of kept those words with me for a long time. I know they didn't mean anything guru like about it. I don't think they realized the weight of those words to me. But just breathe is everything and breath means life in the dictionary. You know, it's really. That is our foundation. So when that's in place, then you have your ceiling as high as it goes for your potential to do whatever it is.

I love that. I love that. Yeah, I used to always Be a big planner. I had every. I mean, I still like to plan, but I, like, had everything planned out. I knew exactly how, when, where my life was going to happen. And it wasn't until, you know, things drastically changed in my life that I realized sometimes we don't need a plan. We just need to take a step back, take a deep breath, and go forward from there.

Yeah.

And so that's something I try to do. Even just yesterday, we were taking pictures, and there was someone that was, like, taking a lot of pictures. And I realized we were standing there taking a picture, and I was holding my breath, and I'm like, why am I holding my breath to take a picture? I don't know what that was, but I had to remind myself to breathe.

Just be. Yeah, just breathe.

Yeah, just be. Just breathe.

Isn't that funny?

Yes.

Yeah. I think we find ourselves posturing ourselves in a certain way. We want to be seen or heard in a certain way. And that's not what people want to see or hear either. Even, like, right now, this podcast we're trying to find, like, where's the most quiet place we can do it? It's like, well, so what? We're in a truck right now?

Yeah, we're in a truck. Gardeners came along, they've got the blower, and it's like, well, this is life. It is what it is.

And this is gonna be parking anywhere and doing this. And that's relatable. The person listening to this, they have their own distractions going on. So my new thing is limit the distractions. And that's what meditation is like, largely, is if you're in a room meditating, you hear some book clothes, that shouldn't be a distraction to you. Right. And if you are truly internal and focused and singular, that's not going to be something that distracts you. Same as the gardener's not going to distract us. The UPS truck went by. Shouldn't be a big distraction to us.

Yeah, I just gave a talk, and there behind, in the very back, there was a bar and food being served, and there were some people there that were having a good old time, drinking and getting rowdy. And I had to give this talk. And I'm used to it. And at first I was like, oh, no. That critic came in and was telling me, oh, they don't like me. They're not listening to me. I'm not important enough because they're not stopping the drinking to come listen to me. And then I had to just go, nope, stop. I need to Stop that inner critic. Be in. I always say for me, get out of my head and into my heart.

Oh, that's good.

And so as soon as I can get in my heart, then, you know, I just remember my why and breathe and then move forward.

I think it's finding love for yourself, too. Like, the inner critic is largely a form of self hate. And I don't even know. I don't know where that comes from. I'm not even going to go to spiritual direction with that. But it's there. It's very omnipresent. And for most people, it's pretty much like the first forefront thing that comes up. But having the tools to quiet that voice, that's kind of what we've been talking about. That might be the most valuable thing in life. So you can be you and not let this affect every aspect of your life.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. So true.

Well, I want to ask you a bunch of questions. I want to go backwards here a little bit.

Oh, okay.

Okay. So we're both from Texas.

Yeah.

Which I really admire. And I love that we have a very similar background.

And it's crazy how we met because we met through really through our friend Dan. Yeah, right.

Yeah, we met through Dan. And I think you and I are both equally intuitive with making connections. I don't know. I was kind of drawn to you and I saw your guys podcast and I was like, huh? Like we share a lot of things in common, even in very different ways. Like you're not an ocean swimmer, obviously. And I reached out and with arms wide open, you were stoked to talk to me. We talked on the phone for half an hour and I don't know, I felt like I had known you for a long time. Like we just had this friendship.

Yeah. And then when I finally got to meet you in person today, I felt like I was meeting an old friend or seeing an old friend. When I finally got to see you. Yeah. And I know that might seem kind of odd to people, but I think when you meet someone and you share so much the same, you know, I feel like we're connected and we didn't even know so much that we had in common until we got to talking a little more. And I'm like, oh, well, of course we were friends right away.

Totally. Yeah. Well, okay, so your book, your podcast, there's a theme here. This true grit and grace. Let's go back to. Was it nine years ago when you had your accident?

Yeah, nine years ago, when everything changed for me when.

So hold that. Before Everything changed. What are the biggest differentiators? Like who were you then that you're clearly just not today? Stuff that you got to put behind you and move on from?

Well, stuff that I got to put behind me was. I didn't realize it at the time, but I think so much of my identity and my self worth was based on what I could do and what I looked like. Because my whole life, you know, I was a professional dancer then. I had been in the fitness industry, but I did infomercials and fitness videos and, you know, I was on the news doing fitness. And so I was sponsored by Nike at one time. And you know, I didn't come from an easy background. And so my default was to always do something to make me feel good. And so that meant make straight A's, run the fastest, get the most awards. So, you know, growing up, I had set a record in Texas for running the mile the fastest. I moved out to LA and I would take the most dance classes and I would, you know, work the hardest. When I moved out here, I got four jobs because one job wasn't enough. So I got four, you know, and so I worked hard and I was really caught up in my self worth being what I could achieve, how much money I could make and what I looked like, because a lot of my career had been what I looked like.

That was your value, right?

That was my value. And then suddenly, you know, I'm hit by an SUV while riding my motorcycle home from work. And I had somebody yesterday at this event go, well, what happened to the other guy? And I was confused at first. I was like, what do you mean they were in an suv, Nothing happened to them. She goes, no, the person that was driving the motorcycle. I said, no, no, no, I was driving the motorcycle. It was my Harley. So it was my Harley. I get hit once I stopped sliding across the asphalt, which seemed like eternity. And I looked down at my leg and it was just broken into pieces. My first thought, believe it or not, was, oh my gosh, this kind of sucks. I might have to train clients on crutches for a while.

Oh my gosh. That was literally the first thought.

That was literally one of the first thoughts I had. And then I thought, you know, then I was like screaming out cuss words and you know, call 911 and call my husband. And I didn't want to try to reach around on my backpack and grab my phone because I was hanging on to my leg. I thought my leg, if I let go, I thought it was gonna fall off, because it was into pieces. My foot was off and there was blood everywhere. And I didn't know at the time that you can bleed out within like minutes when your femoral artery is severed. And my femoral artery was severed.

Oh, geez.

And I wish I knew who this guy was. I had a guardian angel. It was somebody from right on the street came and they took off their belt and they made a tourniquet on my leg right away. Well, I got rushed to the hospital. They put me in induced coma. And when I woke up, the first thing that they told me was, we're going to have to amputate your leg. And I was devastated because it was my whole identity, it was my livelihood. But not only that, I was a runner. And running was my drug of choice. Running is what I did. It's what I would do when I was younger and I had like a date that I was so nervous about a guy picking me up, wanting to go out on a date. I would go for a run. If I was, you know, sad, I would go out for a run. That was my meditation. That was my medicine. It was everything. That's how I explored when I went on vacation. I'd go for a run. So this was everything. And now I had somebody saying they were going to amputate my leg. And they said, you've got a 1% chance of saving it. I mean, it's crushed. It's like a war wound. And when they said, you've got a 1% chance, I thought, well, then there's still a chance. And so it took an act of God. We finally found another doctor at another hospital that was willing to try to work on it. And it took 34 surgeries and months in the hospital, but they were able to save my leg. And I had no idea. Sitting in the hospital with my leg all bandaged up and sitting there for months, I had no idea how drastic, how life changing it would be. And I remember I was being, you know, so excited to be getting out of the hospital. And they unbandaged my leg. And I looked at my leg and just being devastated because it really looked like Frankenstein. And from my hip all the way down to my, my toes, I was stapled up and stitched up, tubes coming out of my leg, and I thought, oh, my God. And then I had one of the doctors say, well, you'll never run again and you'll probably never wear shorts again. And it hit me and I thought, oh, my gosh, what am I going to do? And there was a moment in there that I thought, I'll never forget that doctor's word. And I used that to motivate me, to prove to myself that I will run again. And now that wasn't an overnight thing. And I definitely not wearing shorts wasn't an overnight thing. It took me two years to be able to run. Two years of first I had to learn to stand again, Right. And it took me longer than that. It took me about four years before I'd wear shorts again because I had so much shame. But fast forward to today. You know, yesterday I gave an inspirational talk in front of a group of women wearing a dress that at one point I thought, well, I'm gonna have to throw that dress away or give that dress. I had a bag to give to Goodwill because I thought, I'll never wear that again because I could never show my legs. And it's taken a long time, a lot of self love and compassion and self acceptance to get to a place where I finally feel comfortable in my own skin. And I finally can look at my leg with some acceptance. And I kind of look at it now as not, you know, I was so ashamed of it. Now I can look at it as, wow, I went through a lot and I survived that. And I can show my scars so that others know that they can heal instead of looking at my scars as something shameful and try to cover it up.

Right. So you kind of went through this identity crisis that first however many days, weeks, years, but that wasn't your identity. You weren't a runner, you weren't a model. So what did you reveal about yourself, of who you were through this? Like, what did you find was your true identity because of all this, you had to sort of shed and get rid of, in a sense.

Well, I discovered a lot about myself. First of all, I discovered a lot of past wounds and trauma that I did not realize I had been running from my whole life. I was literally running from. Instead of dealing with a lot of trauma that I was trying to cover up and run from by literally running and over exercising and overworking, I realized that I can still be a worthy mom and human and, you know, person and friend and wife and that I didn't have to work for jobs or I didn't have to look a certain way, that I was worthy just being me, that I was enough. And that's taken a lot because I went through this dark period where I really, I was in bed and I was thinking I was having those thoughts of, well, you know, they can find another mom, you know, my husband didn't marry this person. I'm not a good enough wife. And I was about ready to give up. And there was that little bit of light left in me that said, don't give up. Just reach out for help. Gather the little bit of strength and courage that you have and ask for help. And that's when I was like, I need help, because I was trying to do it on my own. I was trying to do everything on my own. And on the outside, I was, like, trying to pretend like everything was okay. And on the inside, I was just dying inside.

Wow. So what was the form of help that you found?

Well, I reached out to a friend because at this point in time, I had gone from having a career and being successful. I had trainers, like three trainers that worked for me. And to losing my career, to being unhappy, to losing hope. I was hanging on by a thread, and I was living in a lot of pain. I was diagnosed with a disease called complex regional pain syndrome, which leaves you in constant chronic pain. It's a disease of the sympathetic nervous system and its cause by trauma. Some people get it from a sprained ankle. You know, I got it by being hit by an suv. But we all, you know, when I found out I had this and that the pain was never going to get better, you know, I had a doctor tell me, you know, you need to get back in your wheelchair. Are you the kind of person that likes to push through pain? And I was like, hell, yeah, I am. I grew up in Texas with grit, and I know how to cowgirl up. And, you know, I'll prove it to you. I'm not going to get in that wheelchair. And I was doing that. I was proving him wrong. I am not going to get in that wheelchair. But what I was doing was sucking it up. And that served me. And it all worked until it didn't. Because I was trying every kind of everything for pain, and nothing was working, including spinal blocks. I had never done a drug in my life. I wasn't a big partier. And all of a sudden, they're inducing me with ketamine to try to reboot my nervous system. So I was being induced with ketamine that wasn't working. I did a spinal stimulator that didn't work. I was trying all these things from all kinds of, you know, reading books to listening to motivational speakers, everything to kind of keep sucking it up and moving along, and everything came tumbling down when the pain just wasn't going away. And I remember drinking wine and thinking, well, this helps with my pain. And I don't, you know, I'm an athlete and I don't really want to have to do this. But I guess if this is going to help with my pain, I guess I can live with that. I'll just, you know, because I was really healthy.

Do you think it was more numbing your brain from the pain itself?

Well, at first I thought I was just numbing the pain, but as I got into it, I realized the drinking was starting to numb out that self critic your feelings. My feelings because at the same time I had started trying to write my book and I was writing about my experience as a child, which weren't so pretty or easy. And so everything was right in the forefront. It was right in my face. So every. And I thought, well, shoot, this drinking wine kind of numbs it all out. And you know, I think that's something that there was a lot of shame that came from talking about that because before I knew it, I was drinking every day. Before I knew it, all of a sudden I was addicted to drinking and I was physically addicted. And I got scared one day when I had tremors and I thought, oh my God, I've got a problem.

Wow.

And there was a lot of shame that came admitting it to myself. How was I an athlete and a good girl, married to a lieutenant with a highway patrol? An alcoholic? How could that be? How did this happen to me? And I remember going to my husband and admitting that to him and he said, you don't have a problem and you are not going to go to anybody with this kind of a problem because you don't have a problem. Anybody would understand drinking with what you've been through. Anybody would probably do the same thing. Which was really hard to hear because I knew that I needed help. But to hear that made me think, oh well, maybe I don't. So I went from hiding my drinking to hiding going to a recovery program. I went to a 12 step program to get help. And I had to hide that because I didn't want my husband to disapprove. I didn't want other people to know that I was trying to recover from this. So it was quite, you know, it took a lot of, well, you know what it took? It was desperation and a willingness. I wanted so badly to have my life back. Not just to have my life back, to have a better life. And I was willing to do whatever it took to get that back. And it's been a little over. And this isn't something that I talk about a lot. In fact, I've never talked about this on a podcast before, but it is something that I think I wanted to share, because if there's anybody listening out there that needs help or feels like it's too shameful to talk about or to reach out and get help, you know, addiction doesn't discriminate. It's widespread among, you know, I know a lot of people. That doesn't matter if you're rich, poor, old, young, male, female, you think you're strong, whatever, you know. And I remember when I first went into a recovery, I went into a room and thought, how did a good girl like me end up in a place like this? And then I think it is a pivotal moment for me because it has been the biggest blessing in my life because it has really allowed me to connect spiritually on a. Much like I feel more connected with God now than I ever have, and I grew up going to church, but now I feel more spiritually connected. I have a community of people, a sisterhood and brotherhood of people that I feel more connected to. And I think it has repaired. You know, I make a living amends to my children and my husband, and I think it has allowed me to have an even, you know, bigger bond with my husband.

So. Well, what resonates a lot with me there is it makes me think of myself a bit like, you hear about this rock bottom that people have to hit to be inspired or feel the urgency to make change. But that rock bottom can be very subtle, and that rock bottom can be. The appearance of that cannot be so much to someone else. Like, they might not pick up on what they're saying.

Oh, there are a lot of people that they had no idea how bad it really was for me. My rock bottom was I didn't want to live anymore, but I wasn't, you know, I hadn't created a lot of chaos or a lot of times people's rock bottoms or they went to jail or they almost died. Now, I almost died a couple times, but it wasn't. That wasn't. It was just, you know, it wasn't that big a deal. Yeah, your rock bottom can be different. There might be somebody listening today that this may be their day, that they said, I'm going to stop digging. My rock bottom ends today. Your rock bottom ends wherever you just stopped digging, you know, And I was like, I'm going to stop digging.

This is it.

I want my life to be better.

Well, and it's kind of the onion you keep peeling away layers and Revealing more and more and you go in deeper. It's kind of a two sided thing. It's a bit of a Pandora's box. There's no turning back. Once you have awareness of these things, you start making progress, doing the work, quote unquote. But it's also the biggest blessing and it's the most necessary work that something has to slap you in the face and say, hey, like this needs to be done. Or you're just gonna keep on this very low frequency your entire life and never reach a potential that you hope to reach.

Yeah, I kind of thought, you know, this can't be it. This cannot be the rest of my life. There has to be more, it has to get better. They're just, I know there has to be a different way, a better way. And then I realized I have a choice. And the truth is we all have a choice. And I think when we realize we have a choice, we take our power back. Because we can, you know, have somebody say something to us, like the doctor that told me, you need to go get back in your wheelchair. Your life's never going to be the same. You're going to be permanently disabled. Well, yeah, I may have. My life isn't what it used to be, but my life is so much better in different ways. And I've had to decide that I want to choose happiness, that there's a different way, that everything is figureoutable, that we can find a way to figure out what our purpose is and how to have joy.

That's right. Oh, that's so good. I'm kind of absorbing what you just said right there. And my thing I keep coming back to recently for me internally is limit the distractions. There's so many things in the world that will tease us and sort of tempt us. And if you can scrape all that away, it's pretty clear and everything is there for you. I kind of want to share my story a little bit, if you don't mind.

Yes. You were gonna tell me something in the coffee shop and you're like, I'm gonna save it. I want to know.

Well, and I haven't shared this on a podcast or with many people that matter either, because it's very personal to me. But I'm also ecstatic to share it because I think it's relatable. So I never seemingly had a drinking or drug problem, but I, for years smoked weed almost every single day. I would have a beer or two at night or maybe bourbon. And I justified it as, you know, I did it in a very controlled way. You'd never see me drunk, you'd never see me like messed up, quote unquote. I was always very presentable with that and articulate still, even if I was buzzed. But I had a problem. I mean, I definitely had a problem. And I was utilizing these things in a way to be avoidance of my reality. And I didn't know how to go inward. I didn't know how to address or even recognize what I was feeling. Literally in the past, if you asked me how something made me feel, I have a really hard time saying that. Made me sad, it made me happy, made me mad. I just did not have those tools. And so drugs, alcohol is what I would use to just like kind of numb out and not have to think about anything. And I always justified it as that how I was creative, I would get high. I think a lot of people say that totally. I would, you know, listen to records or play music or have a deep conversation with someone or what I guess thought was a deep conversation. So my wife gets pregnant and this, I mean, we would have a drink before in the past. She would drink wine before. And you know, when you're pregnant, you probably shouldn't be drinking or doing drugs. So she wasn't drinking and she got cleaner and cleaner with her, her food and intentional everything. She was putting her body and she always was, but I mean really intentional. And I was still doing the same thing. I was still getting high. I was still doing my thing, getting beers, collecting bourbon. Like that's how I justifies it. I was a bourbon collector, right. And something happened. It was, I think she was about five months pregnant. And I'm on the couch at night and this is our normal nightly thing. We'll maybe watch an episode of something, have some conversation and go to bed. And I'm buzzed, I'm a little bit high. And I say something to her that was just silly. And maybe if she would have been buzzed, it would have been funny. But she kind of gave me this look and not out of judgment, but sort of just like, you know, we're not on the same page right now. And it just hit me like, what the heck am I doing? I have a five month pregnant wife here. She can't drink because she's creating our human. And here I am numbing myself, getting messed up by myself next to her on the couch. And it just, it hit me, I'm like, this is pathetic. This is so pathetic. Like no one's partaking or with me in this. This is me on my own. And it was just so evident, like, I do have a problem.

Wow.

So the next day, I told myself I wouldn't drink that night. I still got high. Yeah, I still got high for a few nights in a row. And I told Courtney, like, two days into or three days into it, I was like, man, it's great being sober, but I was being sarcastic. She's like, you're dry. You're not sober. It kind of hit me too. I was like, okay, well.

Well, she knew that terminology.

She did. She's. Yeah, she did. She knows a lot of the work. She's done a lot of the work herself, and not from add. So then I stopped smoking, and that's when it kind of clicked. Day 5, 6, 7, it kept going on, and I was like, I feel better. Before this, I was yawning all the time. I was taking naps. I wasn't sleeping great. I was moodier, My energy was low. All these things, and I wasn't doing things anymore. And Court at one point was like, you look really good right now. And this is my wife. Sound, like, kind of perked up. Like, yeah. She's like, yeah, your skin looks good. Like, you look fresh. Your memory's better.

Isn't that amazing? Because when I stopped drinking, I lost weight, but it was puffiness. I was puffy. And I remember going to the gym and having people going, oh, my God, you look so much better. What are you doing? And I was like, I stopped drinking. And they're like, really?

Yeah.

Like, yeah.

So for me, it's been 9 months ish right now, and I don't even have the exact date because for me, it wasn't like it's intentional. Like, here's my date. This is it. I kind of fell into this after this moment, and I just. I feel good. And yes, having my daughter definitely put fire under my feet. But I realized this pattern I was doing was this self abuse and the lack of self love that I did not know how to go inward. I did not know how to go internal and really look at what was going on and the why and the reasoning behind that. So nine months in now, and, like, I'm almost on the other end of the spectrum. I see someone getting a beer at dinner, and I'm almost like, idiot. Like, you're ruining your life over here. Just, like, critical, you know, I try and quiet that down, but it more interestingly goes to show. It's like, okay, like, I'm in this. Like, this is where I am. This is who I Am. And I think for the first time, I feel like I am who I am, and nothing else is defining me as far as, like, a substance goes. And it feels awesome. My memory's super sharp. I remember everything now. Like, my lens is just super polished and clean, and I'm seeing life in a very different way. And I don't mean this in a way where I'm bashing alcohol or anything else, because maybe someone else can responsibly have alcohol.

Yeah. Like, my husband can drink, and he's fine. He can have half a beer occasionally. A beer. A whole beer occasionally. And that's fine. But for me, I would drink one, and then I'd be obsessed. Well, I need another one. Well, I just want one more. Well, I want one more. And I realized that how easily I kind of stepped into that one more. Because before when I was running, I'd be like, oh, let me run one more lap, or let me win one more race or let me train one more client. It was a lot. That was so much of my makeup. And it started young. Like, working one job wasn't enough, so I had four at one time. And so it was like, I did the same thing with.

Is there any bit of approval seeking in that, you think? Is it looking for recognition or for approvals of someone else?

Probably.

Probably so, right? Yeah, probably sounds like it.

Yeah.

Huh.

And I was just thinking of that, actually, now that you brought that up, I was just thinking of that last night because I did this speaking engagement yesterday, and I didn't feel good about it. And I was laying in bed last night, and I actually asked myself, why don't I feel good about this? I guess I could have done better. Like, I'm very good that that critic came out, and I was kind of beating myself up, and I thought, I know why. It's because the event organizer didn't come to me and say, good job. Thanks for coming.

Right.

And I thought, oh, I need approval.

You needed that?

Yeah, I need approval. And can we get to the point where we don't need approval? Like, just doing our best and showing up is good enough. And a lot of things all boil down to when I can take a look at it and I ask myself, like, I go through, why are these feelings coming up for me? Because before I would just numb out. I'd be like, oh, that was a hard day, or whatever, and I'm just gonna have a glass of wine and kick back and reward myself for doing so much. I'm gonna reward myself.

That's reward Right? Yeah.

By like, polluting my body is I'm gonna reward myself and I just numb out so I wouldn't think about it. So now instead of doing that, I look inward and I ask myself, well, why is this coming up for me? Or I acknowledge the feelings that come up and I embrace those feelings. Instead of trying to numb them out or cover them up or whatever I would do in the past. I try to look inward and embrace and accept. And then if I'm still not feeling good, go, okay. What is one thing that I can do to be grateful for what I went through or how I'm feeling to shift my perspective on things? And so I use gratitude a lot as my medicine to shift my perspective and get me focused on the present moment.

And it highlights all that is good. And we all have good stuff in our lives. Like Courtney, I think before bed is to do a top two. And we call it top two. It's like, what were the best two points of today? And it's never like, oh, I won this trophy. That was my number one. It's always like, the stuff that might seem smaller or trivial to somebody else. It's like, I love that moment when you and Sophia smiled at me when I walked in the door. And it just, again, it shows gratitude for myself. My life shows gratitude towards them for offering that to me. It's a nice way to end the day.

And my daughter and I do that when I get in bed with my daughter. We have cuddle time with us and our little three pound dog. And our dog knows, just trained like, hello, it's cuddle time. What are y' all doing? Come on, we gotta get in bed.

Ready for it? Yeah, ready.

So our dog has us trained and we get in bed. And I always say, what is the best thing that happened to you and what are you grateful for? And now she's 11, so a lot of times she says some crazy stuff that is like, you know, it's like, oh, really? Come on now, what are you really grateful for? But I'm at least, you know, getting her in the practice and focusing on those things. And sometimes she may not, in the moment, get serious about really thinking about what she's grateful for. But I know it's setting that example for her and hopefully, you know, getting her into that practice so when she grows up. And I know this from my older daughter because, you know, my older daughter has since, you know, lives on her own, she's a grownup, and she tells me things. I remember when I went to go See her apartment for the first time. I was like, oh, she is like, you know, she does clean up after herself. She does, you know, have a little ritual where she likes a candle and get. Has that quiet time. So I know that it does later on in life. I know that it. So I'm trying to see if maybe she'll use this as a way of practicing gratitude.

Aw. It's such a beautiful opportunity to have to really like. Someone else will look up to you, and they'll want to take after you. And Courtney and I are very consciously parenting in this way. And every day, I mean, it's super exciting. I'm like, wow. Like, we had to set the example for her, the one that we think is going to be the best for giving out to the world and being open and spreading her love. And. Yeah, the gratitude one is perfect. It's one that I think we will probably always do as a family. I love it.

Yeah.

Hey, I think we should do a part two of this some point soon.

I know, because, you guys, listen, like I said, we are sitting in the truck and sweating. I'm sitting in the sun, and I've got black pants on, and I'm sweating. I literally have sweat rolling down my face. But I love talking to you so much, and I wanted to share this with the audience, so we'll definitely.

Let's do it again. I like this format too. True Grit and Grace meets Smog Cats. I think this is kind of a cool way to do it where we get to maybe express ourselves more than just interviewing somebody else. I got to share stuff today that I would not have shared on my podcast. It sounds like vice versa as well.

Yeah.

So it's kind of a cool format.

Yes. And it was totally worth sitting in a sauna getting frizzy hair.

So here's what I'm gonna project. So session two is gonna be after we get out of the ocean.

Oh, yes.

So we're gonna do our swim, and we're gonna talk about the experience. You're gonna be able to sense as the audience your energy from that and what you got from the ocean, and we'll talk through what came up and what that means for you and how you move forward from that.

Yeah. Because I said I don't have fear of the open water, but when I really started to think about it, I do have a fear that it would make the pain in my leg worse. That's what came up. So I am anxious to overcome that and prove that I can get in the water and do this and share it with the audience.

I'm stoked. It's gonna be awesome.

Thank you so much for sweating in my truck that smells like a barn. We've got baseball caps, motorcycle jackets, coffee cups, water. Thank you for sitting in and joining me.

Likewise. This has been my pleasure, and I'm really, really looking forward to part two. I think the ocean piece might change the conversation totally. Yes.

Thank you. Wait, wait, wait, wait. Where can we find you?

Oh, okay.

Oh, we can't forget that.

So Smog is online. The URL is Smog community. S. The URL.

Smog community, yeah. Okay.

On Instagram, it is Smog Swims. My other side of the business for swim coaching is the swim mechanic. That's my main. And then also the website is theswimmechanic.com.

yes.

And you guys check out the Instagram because it's beautiful. Just scrolling through all your pictures is beautiful.

A lot of ocean imagery, and it definitely, I think, entices people to want to get out there.

And your website's beautiful as well.

Thanks.

Yeah. So, yeah, check them out.

And what about you? So I can use the same.

Okay. Amberly lago.com.

okay.

And if you check out my Instagram at Amberly Lagomotivation, you can check my bio and find my TEDx talk and my book, True Grit and Grace. You can find that on Amazon's probably the easiest. You can get it at the bookstore, but it's so much easier just to get it on Amazon.

Two hours to your door.

Yes, to your door. So, yeah, True Grit and Grace on Instagram as well. But my main is amberly lagomotivation.

Yeah. Amberlylogo.com you got a lot of gems on there, for sure. So I'll share with my. My people and get the word out.

And I'll have this in the show notes as well. Okay.

All right.

Okay. Until next time.

Thanks so much for joining us this week on True Britain Grace Podcast. If you like it, please rate it or share it with your friends.

That would help, too.

If you're not yet on the newsletter list, come over to Amberly Lock and jump on it. While you're there, you can grab a free downloadable gratitude journal. And you might just want to check out my book or even check out my monthly motivational membership. Thanks again for tuning in, and we'll

see you next week.