From Burned Out to Rising Strong with Mairin Moore Cane

When you first started going, oh, something's not right. I'm starting to lose weight and I'm throwing up. What were you telling yourself?

My body started to atrophy at one point. I was using a cane and everything else. I couldn't walk. It hit a really dark low. I didn't know if I wanted to continue. There was a dark night and truly I was done. I could not go anymore. And I really was. I was £90 at about that point. I didn't want them to see me give up. No matter what life struggles are, you got to show your resilience and to give up, we really had to take a different step. My life didn't end. I, as a business owner, could not stop. But I had to show up differently, and I had to decide what that looked like.

When did you go from surviving to truly thriving throughout the day.

The biggest thing, as much as most people won't understand when we're going through something, they think woe is me. And they don't necessarily recognize the rooted moment in who we are at that time. We're so busy thinking about who we were in our past or who we should be in our future or where our life is supposed to be necessarily. We have these assumptions that we can control things.

What would you say to a woman who they feel like they're scared to speak up?

I think that we as women have a gentle, soft voice, which actually can be a hindrance in certain ways, but it can also be one of our biggest assets because there's a calming in it that most men don't have. And I hate to say use it to your advantage, but absolutely use your voice.

Hey there. Thank you so much for tuning in to the Amberly Lago show. I hope that you will grab your favorite cup of coffee or tea, take a deep breath, and get ready for a powerful and soul nourishing conversation. Because I have the honor of sitting down with someone whose words and wisdom I feel like are a breath of fresh air in the world. Especially now that I feel like just never stops moving. It's this hustle, hustle and grind kind of mentality. I have Maren Moore Kane with us, y'. All. She is a best selling author, she's a speaker, she's a mentor who helps women slow down and. And men too, I guess. But you work with a lot of women and she does retreats and a mastermind and so many things, but it's really to really heal deeply and rise into their power without apology. And she knows this from experience. And she tells all in her new book, I have it right here. Rooted, not rushed. And it's healing, reclaiming, and rising in a world that told you to shrink. And you know what? It is a beautiful reminder that your worth isn't found in how fast you're going or how much you're doing, but it's found, found, and how grounded in who you are. And so I am so excited to get ready for this conversation. So, Maren, thank you so much for being on the show.

It's such an honor to be here. Thanks for having me.

Oh, yes. Well, I am super excited about your book. It just came out recently, and it was an instant bestseller. So congratulations, first and foremost, on that.

Thank you. It's been an exciting time.

Yeah. And, you know, I really feel like in the world that we live in today, especially with social media, when things can look so perfect and look so easy, and it seems like success should just be achieved very fast, it's not always that way. And so I would love for you to take us behind the scenes, because also, if you're watching on this. This on YouTube, you can see how just gorgeous Marin is and just looks like a vibrant picture of health. But it wasn't always that way. And I love learning from people who have actually been through the struggle and gotten through the other side. And I honestly think that's one of the reasons why you and I connected so deeply. It was because I was like, we get each other. Like, we've had some serious health struggles. And so can you take us back to before the book, before you're sitting here, before you've, you know, been speaking on stages and doing all these interviews and holding these retreats, what your life looked like before. Because I want people to know, like, where you came from so they know that, oh, wow. If she can get through hard times, I can, too.

Yeah, absolutely. I will tell you in very long story short, as an entrepreneur, there's always stories of struggle and resilience that you have to work. In fact, I tell my children every day that get used to it, because this is life. And the moment that you think you've got this one figured out. God. And life has a way of stretching you further into that. Going back to. Even when I was. I graduated high school, I was supposed to go to college, and I met my husband, and we started a business together, which really was totally unplanned. But that was about 26 years ago at this point, and we went on the. The entrepreneur ride. We were in 34 states at one point. We've had our ups and down through it all, and I have learned so much along the way. The biggest part of me that I've learned is just, you know, that life is a journey and you think you have it figured out and you don't. But I was completely hustling for 25 years. And the. I would say, I think one of the things that you and I connect with so much is, is that we're go getters and we just don't settle for really anything in life, no matter what that means, whether that's good, bad, easy, difficult, whatever. And so for me, I took all of those struggles and I just kept going through 25 years of it. The problem with that is when you don't listen to your body, when you hustle so hard, you have a way of burning yourself out. And I didn't recognize and understand what my body was telling me until it was almost too late. And, you know, we've been through struggles enough. Financial management, growth. There are just so many different kinds of struggles that I could talk probably this whole podcast about. But really all of those took a toll. And I, I kept ignoring them and saying, this is okay, this is okay. And then in 2020, it hit a point where I could no longer ignore that, and I went into a very fast decline. And I've had celiac, which was really the first indicator of, of my, my chronic illness that I have now, which is gastroparesis and a few other comorbidities in it. But really it's focused on the gastroparesis and the nervous system issue, which the nervous system, if you're not listening to it, that's exactly what will tell you what's wrong, really. I hit a point in 2020 where I started losing weight very fast. I was vomiting every day, I could not keep weight on. And it became to a point in about 2122 that found myself completely bedridden. I was £90, I was at risk of feeding tubes, and I was deep in my chronic illness. I really didn't identify who I was anymore. I didn't identify my life, my body, everything. My body was just saying, you thought you had it figured out, now let's figure it out a new way. And I didn't know how to manage that. I had to completely learn how to really go from the ground up and restart all over again, identifying who I was, what I wanted with my life, if that meant anything at all. Because at one point I was. All I was doing was sitting in bed and I was struggling, trying to figure out what that meant for my life. Here I am a couple years later, and it's truly just having to really listen to my body and start over from ground one and say, it's okay, show me where we're supposed to go as a body and really learn to work with it and through it.

Yeah, well, I want to go back to where you said, you know, you were pushing and pushing and pushing, and your nervous system does tell you like, okay, it's time to slow down. That happens to me where I don't want to slow down. I want to just keep going and I want to just grit it out. And then now if I don't do that and I don't listen to the pain from the complex regional pain syndrome, it will, if, if I keep pushing through the pain, it will actually start to shut my brain down or it makes me get very nauseated and I can't stop throwing up from the pain. And so I understand that feeling of wanting to keep pushing through. I, I think you and I are a lot alike in those ways. And I, I feel like I'm hard headed and it's taken me a lot to learn these things. But when you first started going, oh, something's not right, I'm starting to lose weight and I'm throwing up, what, what were you telling yourself? Because, you know, the average person would be like, well, I'm not well, I need to go to the doctor. Or maybe I need to take a, you know, take a day off of work. What were you thinking and what were you doing? What when that first started happening?

Well, we were in an interesting time already. So I had just gotten back from a trip. It was actually a personal development trip with a friend of mine. And we thought we would just get in, you know, a quick little short trip for the beginning of 2020, which we thought was a great, you know, start to a new year. And little did we know anyway that Covid was going to make different plans for us. But I found myself in an F3 tornado. I was literally, what, two blocks from it. I kept hearing the sirens, and I'd never been a part of anything like that. And I kept, you know, seeing people acting normal, and I kept thinking that it must be normal. But it wasn't until afterwards that I realized that it was absolutely not normal. Nothing in my life at that point was normal. And I think when I came home, just in general, we as entrepreneurs think that, you know, let's keep going. Let's, you know, you don't stop. You can't stop. You have so much to tend to, so much to manage, so much to continue forward. If you stop, then your business stops. And you, you, you can't function in that sense. And so in my brain, it was, don't stop, you gotta keep going. And it truly was. Even with COVID quarantine, I was over here still. In fact, my girlfriends and I were talking about it the other. That what was wrong with us. Everybody else is at home, they're in their jammies, and, you know, they're, you know, doing home projects. And here I was over there for, you know.

Right.

Probably about the first two months before it really said, you're done. I was starting new businesses, we were recording new things, and I was still trying to plan for events because I also have an event planning company at that point. And I had to really decide after a couple months of throwing up, well, this isn't working. I. I can't. I couldn't. And it went from waking up with it every day, sitting on the bathroom floor all day, and those points turned into panic attacks because what are you supposed to do with your life? Um, and I was so. And it, you know, I think any woman can identify with morning sickness and how miserable it is.

It is awful. You know, I was talking to you about just other day, how that when I get in so much pain, it'll make me nauseated, and I start getting anxious because I'm like, oh, I don't want to throw up. I don't want to throw up, because if I start, I hope I can stop, you know?

Yeah.

And you were like, giving me tips and tricks of, well, try this, try that, try, you know, And I was like, okay, really? Okay, let me try that. Let me try.

I mean, so that you, you know, I mean, you literally, it shuts your world down. I think I am the most resilient person until you get me nauseated. And then truly, my ends. And I, I, I say that, you know, and jokingly, but truly, it feels that way. And my nervous system felt the same way too. It felt like my world was ending. My body was literally going through panic attacks while I'm on the floor, my heart's hitting tacky and brachycardia, trying to just manage through it. And I didn't even identify for the first two years exactly what was going on other than, all right, we just gotta find a tip and a trick to keep going. And so I literally was. I was still logging into my calls from bed because we were, we were deemed Essential through Covid in order to continue our business. So here I am logging in from the bathroom floor with my camera off, back in bed as much as I could, trying to stay as sober as possible. But with medications, you know, to, you know, get through the vomit, you're doing anything you can just to keep a clear head, which doesn't really happen. Well, not to mention the nutrients that I was getting rid of, which I became very chronically dehydrated and malnourished. My body started to atrophy. At one point, I was using a cane and everything else. I couldn't walk. It hit a really dark low. And there was a point where I decided there was a buffer. And I talk about it in my talks a lot because it stands out so much for me. I didn't know if I wanted to continue. There was a dark night, and truly I was done. I could not go anymore. And I really was. I was £90 at about that point. And I was begging on my phone, on the phone to my mommy, even for multiple times, mom, I don't understand what's going on. I don't understand the purpose of this. I don't understand why God's doing this. I just wanted to be done. I didn't know who I was. And I had to really sit in that dark moment of that night and decide, okay, why are you doing this? What are you doing this for? And it truly wasn't for me. It was for my kids. I didn't want them to see me give up. No matter what life struggles are, you gotta show your resilience and to give up. If I did that, then my kids would think that that's the way life is as well. So that truly got me through a lot of times. And then about 20, 23, I decided, you know, with some real faith and trust in what God had in store, I realized that you can't control any of this. All you can do is manage through each and every day and be present with it and be entirely grateful for what you have and just go with it. And did that mean that life stopped? No. Did it mean that my business ended? No. In fact, it continued. There were times where. And we're still struggling through, to be very frank with you, in that business. We're still struggling to get back on our feet. But I will be honest with you, it also brought us through how to be better leaders and better teams with our company. We had to really define who we were, why we were doing it, and really get it really explicitly clear in the Business that we were, we really had to take a different step. My life didn't end. I, as a business owner, could not stop. But I had to show up differently, and I had to decide what that looked like.

Well, how was it that. What was it that? Was it just the. The thought that you had that helped you make the decision not to give up and keep going? Or was it prayer? Was it a friend? Was it somebody you called? What do you think was that first step that you took that enabled you to keep moving forward? Because I know there's probably a lot of people listening and some strong people out there that are really struggling and feel like throwing in the towel. I mean, I've been there. And so I wondered, what's something that somebody could do who's really struggling, like maybe just on giving up on their business or something? What's the first thing that somebody can do to not give up?

You know, I think, like, you had given all of these lists of things that we could have done. It was all of the above. I was willing to try anything and everything. I mean, to the point that I. I would sit there and, you know, we all come up with a word of the year resolution that was for me every single day. What. What's my word? What's keeping me going today? And I would sit there because I didn't have the energy to even get up. I could barely walked to my front door at that point that I had to decide if this is it, what does it look like, and to what fullest can I give every single day? And so sometimes it was just sitting in prayer. Sometimes it was reaching out to my mom. I'll be honest with you. And a lot of people will say that they identify with. This is when you get sick. A lot of the people don't understand it or they don't know how to manage it with you. They don't know what you're going through, so it's easier to go away. And I did. I lost a lot of that. I lost a lot of the people my life that I. That were important to me that way. And interestingly enough, I'm now coming back around in certain ways, and I've had to kind of boundary a few things, but I've also learned more about myself and what I needed in each and every single day. Through that, I used to write lists of what my goal is, who I was each day, what I wanted to identify. Like, all of it had to look very different for me. And I will tell you that each day, it. It was different, but it also is where I created was what I called the now I use in. In my. In my formatting of. Of my talks I call in my podcast is Root, realign and Rise. Because each day was at my worst. All right, where am I sitting right now? What am I going to do with this? What am I carrying today that isn't mine that I can let go just to survive this day? What's one small win? What. What can I do with that? And really just looking for the gratitude in each and every day realigning was identifying the anchor of everything that I was at that point. Because I'm not just my business. I'm not even the person I used to be. So who am I now? And so a lot of it was almost having to rebuild. And I, as silly as it sounded, I would literally write out the dream person of who I wanted to be from where I was in that perspective every single day. Sometimes we go on Pinterest or whatever, and we would create boards or things like that. As females, I think we're kind of in a creative mindset more than maybe some males. Maybe males have it a little bit differently. But for me specifically, it's getting creative. And it was really diving into what that looked like. And so I was always making vision boards from that. I was always writing things down that way and keeping myself grounded in who I was not being in my performance at that point. And I had to be willing to accept, accept what I couldn't do each day and say, you did a good job. You just got through enough today. And finally, lastly, three. Take three deep breaths and say, it's okay. You're here right now, and that's enough. That's really all I could do.

That's beautiful. And I love that you mentioned so much and talk about the creativity and keeping that, holding that vision for yourself, because I think to keep the momentum going, that it's important to first know where you want to go. And so every day you were focused on, this is not where I'm staying. I'm going here. And you're able to take the right steps to do that. But you. You said surviving a day. And I know I have felt like just survive. I survived this day, especially going through so many surgery after surgery. It was like, okay, I made it. I survived through that day. When did you go from surviving to truly thriving throughout the day?

Well, you know, it's funny, as I was hearing you talk, I actually wanted to mention something. The biggest thing, as much as most people won't understand when we're going through something, they think woe is me. And they don't necessarily recognize the rooted moment in who we are at that time. We're so busy thinking about who we were in our past or who we should be in our future or where our life is supposed to be necessarily. We have these assumptions that we can control things. And I think the biggest. The biggest gift I got in all of this, and I say gift because I can recognize it now, it was so difficult at the time, but it truly is. That was my truth is that I had to find who I was in that moment and be willing to accept that. And when I was able to accept that, I was able to figure out how that looked like in the creativity portion or how that looked like in taking those next steps. Because until you do that, that it's really difficult to define anything until you know who and what you are in those moments.

Oh, that's so important. I think that really accepting where you are and who you are in the moment is the beginning of any transformation. And there are times that I think, man, I may not be where I want to be right now, but it's a heck of a lot better than where I used to be. So I'm grateful for where I am. You know, that truth is the biggest

gift that we can give ourselves, I think. Yeah.

Yeah. Taking a good, hard look at ourselves, being radically honest, for sure. It's not easy. For me, it wasn't. I wanted to just keep pushing and going, and it's ugly.

True. Sometimes it's. Sometimes you don't like what you're looking at, but that's okay, too, because that's how you build from there.

Yeah. Well, what would you say somebody who feels like they're in survival mode, like they're just like every day, they just feel like, I made it through another day. They wake up exhausted. They feel depleted. They're on the brink of burnout. Or maybe they are burnout. What. What would you say to that person?

One, good job getting through yesterday. Two, good job getting through today to where you're at right there. It's not easy. Secondly, be gentle to yourself. And three, allow yourself to grow in it. It right now is a opportunity to find the strength in yourself. And sometimes that doesn't sound like it's something that you even want to do, but if you can just show gratitude and the things that you have, sometimes it just ends up being a little bit clearer for yourself that way. Just in itself. Just by saying the little girl of who you were, who, who started from day one, probably didn't imagine that they would be there. But look how far you've come in life and this is just a part of that. And life is a gift. We. Where we don't know how long, we don't know what it's going to look like, but to be grateful for what we have, and I think that that's the whole true meaning of life, is to give that back. And gratitude.

Yeah, that's so good. And, yeah, you know, it's the important things in life. Right. Like, I was on the phone this morning with someone on my team and they're so sweet. They had, they had switched. I gave them the login to my TikTok. So I was like, you know what? Yeah, maybe you could help me with Tik Tok, because that's like the last platform that I ever post on. Like, I'm. I try to get Ruby to do it for me, but I'm like, okay, I feel you. You know, I'm like, oh. So anyway, I gave her my stuff and all of a sudden I look at my TikTok and it's like my name on TikTok has changed my. To her name. Like she did something and it's her name and my handles different and, and so it's all off. And she was like, oh, my gosh, I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. And you can't change it back. You can only. It takes like a month before you can change your, your handle on TikTok and then it's a week before you can change your name on TikTok. And it's like all the things that I have that are linked to TikTok no longer work because everything's been changed. And at first I was kind of like, oh my gosh. And I'm like. And I said, you know what? I didn't. I mean, I wasn't letting her know that I was breathing like that, but I was kind of in my head going, oh, crap, what do I do? You know? And I was like, you know what? Don't worry about it. I was like, it's, it's social media and it's not like a, you know, a worldly problem. And it's not like people are binging my TikTok and just waiting for the next and wondering why it's your name instead of mine. You know what I mean? And I'm like, and if I have people unfollow me because think it's somebody else now, then that happens. What can we do? You know? But it's like just remembering, like, what's really important is. And I have, you know, Ruby's about to go to college, and I. I'm counting down, like, the. The months that I have left with her, and I am just feeling like every moment I'm just like, yeah, you

want me to take you to Target?

Yes. What do you want to do? What do you. You know? And I have to remind myself what's important by not, like, staying on my phone while I'm in the car with her or while she's wanting to talk to me and being on my phone. So I'm glad you brought that up, because I think once we go through a hard time, it's a really good reminder of what's really important.

Yeah, I mean, I'm looking at the sign behind you, even that says directed the journey. That's exactly what this entire. Your message is, is that really, sometimes it's not even about us. Sometimes even the example of your TikTok, you know, I could turn around and say, what did you get out of it? As much as we had panic and the fact that it was our technology that's out of control, and it's probably not the best for our brand, in reality, you got an opportunity to let your daughter take over in a way that gave you some grace in not being, you know, in that technology in itself. But you also gave the quality time for you and your daughter to bond that you probably wouldn't otherwise, especially in such a short amount of time. So, yes, it's a very light example, but it really is just the example of when we go through things, sometimes we don't understand why, sometimes we don't understand what they're for. And a lot of the times it's not even for us. That's a lot of my message is you do not have to be whole to lead for a reason. Because none of us are in this perfect. We're not put together. We, you know, we think that we can control everything. And that is absolutely the most important, falsest statement I think that we could actually say in life, we are not in control. Whether you call it God, the universe, we are simply living life, and we are showing up in response to that. And sometimes that's good, sometimes that's bad, but it's the joy through the journey.

Yes, I love that. And it's remembering to spark that joy for sure, because, I don't know, I have to remind myself not to take myself so serious. Like it, life is about having some joy. We're meant to have joy. Yeah.

I have a question for you though. What happened with your TikTok after that? Did it turn out to be great?

Oh, no, no, no, no, no. And Ruby didn't actually take over it. I begged her to take over. I had somebody on my team trying to take over and this just happened this morning where my team.

Okay, okay.

It's gonna be somebody else's name, but it's. So I'm not going to be posting there for a while. Not until I get my name back. But yeah, sure. But I, I'm hoping that Ruby will eventually do my TikTok. She's. She's so good at that kind of stuff, you know, and, you know, and she knows how to do it. And I'm like, I don't really want to sit there and be on TikTok.

Well, she's probably loving the opportunity that she gets to do something with her mom.

Yeah. Yeah. And, oh, I'll tell you one more thing real quick. So Johnny said something about, oh, she wanted me to make her breakfast. And my husband said something about, you know, you're gonna learn, you need to learn to cook for yourself and do your laundry. What are you gonna do when mom's not around? And she said, oh, she'll come visit me. I said, yeah, that's right. That's right. I told her I was going to move in with her. I don't know. I'm, I'm. I know some people are. Get excited about when their kids are all gone and they're empty nesters. I'm like, man, Ruby and I had so much fun together that I'm not looking forward to it, to be honest.

As long as Nugget's in for the ride, right?

Yes.

I love it.

Yes. Okay, so I want to get to this part where I think so often one of the things I hear that women, mostly women, I'm sure there are plenty of men out there that have had this same experience, but most of the time it's women that have come to me. And I've had this in my life too, where I've been told I was just too much. And you know, in Texas they have something. It's hide your crazy and be a lady. Like, like just, you know, sit there and look pretty, don't say anything, you know, shrink, don't stand up for yourself. It's a man's world. Like all the things you know.

Yeah.

When did you notice a time in your life where you felt like you had to shrink. And when did you realize I'm not going to stay small anymore and I'm going to use my voice?

I think that's a whole life lesson for me. Started when I was younger. There was some abuse there that I still don't like to talk about, but I've had to give grace and forgiveness and I stayed quiet for far too long. That's exactly where the book actually started. There was a moment in my entrepreneurship that, you know, you talk about Texas being a big boys club and it was. I was actually selling our contracts to an organization out there. We'll leave them nameless. But there was a time where it was myself and my husband and I, we were the owners of the company. And they insistently kept trying to put not my name on it, my husband's name on it, and actually our vp, who was not really an honor, but I loved giving him that credibility until he decided to take it and run a little bit selfishly with it himself. And that's a whole other story. But there was a time where I hid behind all those male voices because I figured if you sit back and look pretty and you're the polite one and you back up what the men say, then that's where the strength would be. And unfortunately, it kind of slapped me in the face a little bit when we hit a rough spot in our business. In fact, it's in the book that the vice president of our company actually decided for two years, unbeknownst to us, that he thought that he could start his own and do it better. And he had recruited my entire company behind our back and took it. One day he up and left and he backed the computer up and erased it and walked away. And we found this out when we got back from. Actually, we were at an appointment for an opportunity for us to grow and work. And we came back to nothing. And so it really became a point where my husband had to look for another job just to survive and sustain us. And I, I stood in the empty building which at the point was 10,000 square feet of empty hollowness. And you could hear my echo every single day. And I was the only one. But we built that business right back because one, we don't stop. But when we brought that to the organization, they said, well, we only want to work with Jason because that's the only experience they had had was with Jason's voice, my husband, they didn't have my. So they had no idea what my capability was. And so they tried to slap us with the lawsuit and let's just say that got settled and we all went mutually our own ways. And we actually, to this day, actually still do a small amount of business with him, but not, Not a lot. I. There's a little bit of a respect issue there. But I regained my voice. I got it. I got an attorney and I said, this is not okay, because I'm the one in this building every single day. And if you don't have faith in me, then how do you think you're going to even buy my contracts? How the hell am I supposed to fulfill a contract that you have with me? And so I had to really push back and find that voice. And I was shaking in my boots every day because for the first time I had to find that voice in me and that hide behind a man's. And I got my apology. We have built it back and I'm grateful for every step of it. It taught me a lot. But it was a scary time. That was the first time I had to find that voice.

Yeah. And what would you say to a woman who they feel like they're scared to speak up or they're scared and this could be whether it's work related or in their marriage or even in any kind of business, or it could be with a client or a friend and it's a difficult conversation and they feel like they don't want to use their voice because they don't want to. To offend anyone or they don't want to look, you know, bitchy or whatever it's called when a woman speaks up and uses her voice. You know, that's what I've heard before and I've even heard too, like, if I ever. Because I hardly ever raise my voice. So when I do, oh, it's scary. Like, it's scary. It's scary like I have a long fuse. But when it's up, up, yeah, my family gets. Johnny says, don't go Texas on me because he knows. He knows.

I call it the Irish in me. The Irish will come out every now and then. I don't like to yell. You know, for an instance where women, no matter who we are, whatever the situation is, is, this is what I will say. And I think it goes back to whether you're female or a male on this perspective. It's not necessarily the message sometimes it's how we deliver it. I think that we as women have a gentle, soft voice, which actually can be a hindrance in certain ways, but it can also be one of our biggest assets because there's a Calming in it that most men don't have. And I hate to say use it to your advantage, but absolutely use your voice. I also think that we have one life to live. We're not whole. We're. We're not all perfect. So it's not going to sometimes always come out in a way that sounds perfect or looks perfect. But I will tell you that we all have messages in us, and we all have authenticity in us that we all need to hear and see in each other. And I think the more that we can use that voice, the more that we help those other people that we're delivering that message to that probably need something in there. I do think there's instances, obviously, of abuse that, you know, and things that we can't control all the time. And it is scary. And so sometimes it's going to require a little bit more help of using other people's voices in it as well. But I. I truly believe that showing up in the world is about helping other people, and we all need it. We're not. We weren't born on this earth to be alone. We're born to help each other through it. And I think that the more we can use that voice, however soft or loud or however we deliver it, we have to find the right delicate balance with. But it is absolutely necessary.

Yeah. And. And, Maren, you are such a good communicator, and you're so caring and so loving, and, I mean, I get emotional just thinking about it just because I'm so grateful for you. You just mean the world to me,

and I think that the feeling's very mutual. Oh.

You know, and just the way that you care about people and the way that you deliver a message and the way that you speak and your voice is so. So soothing. So I'm sure if you did ever raise your voice and I saw the Irish, it would be scary, but don't ask my children. But, yeah, I mean, you're just such a great communicator, and you truly do. Like, I love having you in the unstoppable mastermind, because you are such a giver and you're such a collaborator, and you are just so caring and supportive to every single woman in the group. You give so much, and you give however you can. You are just. You're amazing. And what role has community? Because you have your own community. You have your. You do your own masterminds. And I think that's important to share, too, because I think it's important, like you said, to not do it alone. And Have a community. And I mean, mean, you know, like I. I have a mentor and I mentor people. I have a sponsor, and I have sponsors. I have a mastermind, and I am a part of a mastermind, you know, and so you're in my mastermind. And it's a safe place for you to be and grow and just continue to level up again and again and again. Because that's what we're all doing, right, Is just continuing you in the level up and. But you have your own masterminds as well. How has community been a part of, like a, A part of your healing and your growing? What, like, how has that played a role in your growing?

You know, thank you for all of that. I think that's very nice. I think community is. Is truly important. No matter if you're in a personal setting, a business setting, what is it they say? I'm trying to think of the percentage of, you know, loneliness really is a lot of the heartbreak of life right now. And it's where chronic illnesses happen. It's where so much comes into play in our world right now. And so community is very important. Community to me is everything. There were times at many multiple moments in my life where I needed women or I needed people in general. We look for, you know, we look, whether it be influencers, mentors, our parents, siblings even, that show us how to lead and leadership. Let's say this isn't just one person. It takes a whole village. Because I could not do my business, I could not do my life, I could not do my family if it didn't involve other people. So what I, what I really subscribe to is showing up for other people and really just letting the magic of what that looks like happen. There were years and years even. Gosh, I think I remember one of my first ones even I had had a. My firstborn. He was. He's 21 now, Connor. He was on my hip. And I needed community. I felt very alone as a. As a mom. And, you know, here I am running a business, but it's very different having people in business versus in your personal life. And I've always looked for ways to, you know, whether it be events or to do things, collaboration is huge. And so I would create these events or opportunities for women to get together, whether it be for a Mother's Day party or, you know, a, a retreat at the beach or. I've done quarterly, quarterly masterminds. I've done so many different types. And each year sometimes brings it a little different just because based off of what we all need in community. And. And I. I don't, you know, get totally founded in what it should look like. It. It flexes every year because it's not just about me. It's about community. And so I think, yeah, absolutely. It's not just one person in it, but, you know, it really takes the village in all of that.

Oh, for sure. I mean, and it's finding the right community. It's fine, because they're.

And protecting it when you have it right.

Oh, yes. That is. You know how important that is to me. Like, I am so protective of my family, my family being like my real family. But I mean, my mastermind.

Absolutely. Absolutely. We pick up, you know, even in our mastermind, we. We pick up when there's dead silence because everybody's hustling or maybe you can feel a little bit of tension or energy because somebody has stress that's going on in their life.

Life.

You know, it's not just about. And I say this, you know, for your mastermind and mine and all the others, it's not just necessarily the work that you're doing in the world. It's how you're showing up with it. And sometimes it takes those people to remind you that. So that's the one thing I love about your mastermind, is the fact that I can log in. And I know that there are people on each side of it who are going through something that's so similar, but yet it may look different. We're just all in the same space of trying to do the best we can in life.

Yeah. And supporting each other, like, absolutely. Like, genuinely, with loving, caring hearts. And so. Yeah. Well, I want to talk to you a little bit more about your book. What is next? So you just got off of a big stage, which you looked amazing, by the way. And Jen, who used to be in the mastermind last year, I guess it was last year, went to see you and said you were amazing. So what. What is next with the book? So you just launched your book. You got off this big stage. You're gonna be on stage again in April for the unstoppable Summit. What's next as far as your book?

You know, I'll be honest with you. When I wrote this book in the first place, it started from journal entries of being in my deep, dark moments. And there were a lot of times that, like I said, I reached out to my mom. I didn't have a lot of people to reach out to. And so really, the book was a way to give back to that for somebody who needed the friend that I didn't have, who could tell me some of the things or give me some of the tricks that got me through. So I gotta be honest with you, when I reached out to you and said, hey, Amberly, how did you do your book? It was because I resonated with you. But I was clearly not in the mindset even of starting what has taken this entire amazing journey of a path down this road of a book and being on stages. And none of my life has been planned this year, but I am. I feel, in all honesty, I'm living in God's purpose for what's happened for me, and I'm. I'm riding the wave right now, and I'm loving every bit of it and appreciating every moment. The book itself is, you know, I'm out there just promoting it for those who I find that may need it. If they're talking to me, like, you know, I just was talking to somebody at the post office the other day about it, and somebody who was going through something, and I said, you know, here's my book. So there's a lot of that. I actually am doing a podcast. I'm in recording prop, or excuse me, I'm in recording right now. And I'm getting to the point where we'll. We'll get it out there once it's ready to go. That should probably be in late November, early December. And that's called Root, Realign and Rise. You can find it now. In fact, there was one. Hey, you know, Mark. You know, Mark, this podcast down. We'll be back. So you'll find it on there. Spotify, Amazon, and all of the others. And, you know, I am really. I found a lot of excitement and passion and being on the stage and sharing in the message that this year has really taken me on and the journey that I've been learning in this entire process. I will tell you, I'm certainly not whole with it. I'm certainly, you know, writing every bit of learning through it and sharing in that entire part of it and. And really, you know, allowing myself to kind of be a work in progress in front of everybody right now, to be really honest with you.

You.

I have a mastermind.

How much. I just. I have to say, look at how much you've accomplished even since we first met. And I mean, look at just. Even your social media is completely transformed. And you're such a gifted writer. Like, y' all gotta follow. You gotta follow her on Facebook, Instagram, all the links will Be in. In the show notes because you are such a. I love reading your captions. And you know what? I'm picky about what I like to read. Of course I loved reading your book so much and felt so honored to get to read it and do the forward. And I just love reading your captions. And that has even changed. And I love seeing you shine on. On stage. And I was just like, I told you the other day, I was like, you've got it. Whatever that it factor is, you've got it. And so I can't wait to see all the amazing things that you are going to be doing coming up soon and can't wait to tune into your podcast as well. Oh, and I'm going to be a guest on your podcast. Right?

I'm so excited to hear your story. More. Yeah.

Yes, I can't wait. Well, now.

Yeah.

Up ahead. Go ahead.

I was just going to say, you know, none of this was easy. I think we all have little things that we enjoy, and I think that's where the talents start to really emerge for a lot of people. For me, telling the story has been such a beautiful. It's really given me a purpose to. To keep going. It's really given me a way to thrive in my life. I've noticed my health is recovering a little bit more so because I'm just loving life right now and just appreciating every moment of it. But I like to write. Sometimes I think I write probably a little too much on my captions, you know, versus what some would say. Well, I love them, but tapping into that source of what we love is really where it's at and that's really where things really start to thrive. So. Yeah. Yeah, it's.

So I'm so glad you said that too, Maren, because, I mean, just this morning I was on a call with a client and she said, she was telling me, you know, I got to have a different difficult conversation. And I said, you know what you're going to feel. But difficult conversations can be hard. I know I've got to have one today, too, but it makes you feel so much better when you can be in alignment or, as you say, rooted in who you are, you know, and. And I think I feel when I'm not in alignment with doing something, whether it be, you know, even a speaking event or, I don't know, a web, I don't know, whatever it might be for work, I feel drained. I feel hired. I feel I don't feel as good. And so I'm So glad you said that because I do feel like when we are in alignment with our, you know, God given, you know, vision and purpose in our. Our values, that we feel better in every way. We feel lighter. It's like a weight lifted off of us.

Yeah. I think there's a little bit of comfort in being uncomfortable when you know that it's to grow you, when you know that there is purpose beyond that, if you can look into that for a reason. And so I absolutely. I don't say put yourself in situations that are necessarily bad, but ways that stretch you and grow you. Standing on stages telling my story has become much easier because I'm. I'm hearing and I'm seeing people who have said that it's helped them so. Absolutely.

Well, your book is amazing and is helping so many for sure. What? Where is the best place for people to grab your book?

It's on Amazon. You can find it just under rooted, not rushed. And I'm sure you'll have the link. You can also find me@marenmorecaine.com and also on any of the socials, Facebook, LinkedIn, Instagram, erinmorecain.

Okay, and finally, one last thing. Finish this sentence for me. Being rooted means Being rooted means allowing

yourself to grow in the hard places, knowing that there's purpose, sometimes not for ourselves, but sometimes it's for others, but in the deepest and best way to grow and really to fulfill life's blessings and journeys of being in great gratitude.

Mic drop.

That was so good. Yeah.

Oh, my goodness. Oh, my gosh. That. You're amazing. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you for being on the show and sharing your wisdom. Thank you for writing this book, rooted, not rushed, that I just love so much. And you guys can find all her links in the show notes. If you are out for a run or you're driving or something, don't worry about it. You can find it in the show notes. Notes. And you know what? Take a screenshot. Whether you're listening on Apple or Spotify or watching on YouTube, take a screenshot and tag us both on Instagram. Me at Amberly lagomotivation and Maren at marenmorecaine. And again, you can find those links in the show notes. But I just appreciate you being here and tuning into the show. I know you could be listening to anything or doing anything else right now, and I just appreciate you being here. And Maren, I appreciate you so much. I'm so grateful for you for sharing. Again, thank you for being on. And we will see. Y' all next week.