Empowering Girls: Unleashing their Superpowers with Melody Pourmoradi

Thank you for tuning in to the True Grit and Grace podcast. I'm Amberly Lago, and I'll be sharing inspirational stories of resilience and empowering ideas to elevate your business and your life, ignite your passion, and fuel your purpose. Hello, and thank you all so much for tuning in to True Grit and Grace. And I have one of my really good friends, somebody I love dearly, and I've been so excited to have her on the show. Melody Poor Morati is here, y'.

All.

She is making huge impact in the world. One girl, one woman at a time. She's got a podcast called Empowering Her. I had a guest of being on her podcast. She's got. I met her because of her first book. Now she has a new book out. I have it right here, and I love it so much that I actually wrote some praise in the book. It's called Empowered Women Empower Girls. She's the founder of Girl Life Coach Training Academy. She's been featured in Forbes. She's been on so many media platforms and changing lives, and I'm just so grateful for the work that she does. Melody, thank you so much for being here. I adore you and I'm so grateful for your friendship, and I love seeing the impact that you're making on so many people's lives, and you've definitely made an impact on mine. So thank you for being here on the show.

Goodness. Amberly, hello, my gorgeous friend. Thank you for having me. You know what? Any light that you see in someone else, it already exists within you. And you, my friend, are a woman who's bringing so much light to the world, and I'm just so grateful to know you.

Oh, thank you. Well, you know, we met because of your first book, and I saw you were having a book signing at in when I lived in la, and I was like, I'll be there. And I think you were maybe a little bit surprised when I actually showed up, but I was like, hey, I'm here. I want to buy your book.

And.

And it was from that moment, we just really connected. I mean, it's great when you can connect online or through a phone call, but when you get to see someone in person and hug their neck and feel their energy, and so ever since then, we've just been great friends. And I love that I got to meet your daughters. But. But before we get started with all the amazing things that you're doing, I just want to talk about how you got into girl life empowerment, how you wrote two books, how you started all these courses. So can we tell the listeners a little bit on how you decided, like, what really inspired you to do the work that you're doing?

Sure, that's a great question. There is so much like there are so many branches to this tree that brought me to where I am today. The first story I will tell is that when I was a young girl, I had these chronic stomach aches and my mom would take me from doctor to doctor trying to figure out what was going on with me. And bless her soul, like she, you know, she was on it. She was like getting all the tests we did, gastroscopies and endoscopies and all those medical things. And every doctor would give me a complete bill of health and say, melody is fine. And my mom and I would walk away like happy that there was nothing physical going on from what they could see, but really stumped, like, what is going on with me? And so I learned to manage the pain and I learned to deal with it really as we do with unknowns, with things that we really can't figure out what's going on with. And I remember sitting in my Psych 101 class at York University in Toronto and hearing for the very first time about the mind body connection and, and how we have so much power to create our thoughts and to create our experiences in this world by really checking in with our own internal state. And in that moment I was like, wait a second, like, what is it that was going on and stirring up within me? And I finally had a word, I finally had language to attach to the feeling that I was feeling. And I learned that what I was actually dealing with was anxiety. You're crying, I kid you not. And it was like, it was just not, you know, you and I are around the same age. It just wasn't something that we talked about. There was a stigma associated with it. You really didn't hear about it very much. But the more I unpacked this idea, the more I realized my goodness, like, if I had the power to make myself sick, then I also had the power to make myself well. And that really began my own self empowerment journey. Really getting in tune with my own spirituality and really understanding my own belief systems and how they were affecting me holistically, like on a whole body level, mind, body, spirit. And so as you know, you know, when, when you experience something like that and when you come out on the other side of it, you just want to scream it off of the rooftops. And so for me, so much of my message Was like, okay, if I can get through this, then anyone can. And I don't want another girl to go through what went through with all the unknowns without also knowing that she is powerful beyond measure, that she has so many inner tools within her to support and guide her through any difficult circumstances she may face. So that was really one of the big, like, light bulb epiphany, aha. Moments where I was like, okay, I am here with this calling, and I really, really want to get started with our girl. So that was the first thing. And the second piece to this story that I think is also a really important piece of it is I went into life coaching. I went and I became a certified empowerment coach, which was one of the best things I ever did. And I've really, really enjoyed coaching the hundreds of women that I've had the opportunity to coach. But the more I worked with women, the more I looked at myself in the mirror, at what I was feeling, who I was being, how I was operating in the world, I. The more I realized that to truly make transformational change in the world or transformational change within our own hearts and minds, what we needed to do was first and foremost, release the layers of fear, doubt, guilt.

I just wrote. Look, I'm taking notes as you're talking.

I see.

And I just wrote down some. Like, I wrote down anxiety and fear. I am not even kidding you. Like, because. So we have so much anxiety and fear. So go ahead. I've got so many questions to ask you. This is so good.

That's it. And I. And I'm so glad that you're feeling it, Amberly, because that's really what it was, and I'm sure you've experienced that in your own life. We were conditioned to be good girls, and we didn't know what it meant. We were constantly told, be a good girl. Be a good girl. And we had to define it for ourselves. And what it really meant for so many of us was to dim our voices to all our light, to, you know, not share our authentic truth.

Oh, girl, I. There was a saying in Texas. It was growing up, hide your crazy and be a lady, right?

Oh, my.

Don't.

Never heard that before, but never heard,

oh, I've got a T shirt that says, hide your crazy and be a lady. And I was like, I don't want to hide my crazy. I don't want to stop being who I am. And, yeah. And it was so much growing in the back Bible belt of Texas. It was all about, like, put a smile on your Face. And I grew up dancing where the. The dance teacher would say, I don't care what's going on in your life. She actually said, I don't care if you lost your best friend or your dog. When you turn around to teach the class, you smile, put the needle on the record and smile and turn. And that's aging myself right there. We used to use records to teach, right? But yeah, it was so much about, be a good girl. Don't be a burden. Don't cause any problems. Be happy, Be the fixer. And that does create anxiety and fear.

It does, doesn't it? And, you know, be a lady. Like, what does that mean? And what are we saying to men? Like, what are the differences between the messaging we give to boys and the messaging we give to girls? Because, like, I would really love to hear some of that messaging that we give to boys. Like, think out of the box. Forge your own path. Get creative. Make money. Like, all of these things that boys hear about stepping into their power are beautiful messages for all young people to hear. We should all feel like we. We can be weird and to own our strange and to, you know, do things our own way. But that wasn't what we were hearing. And the more I coach these women, the more I realize how. What an imprint that put on our hearts and how it has stopped us from stepping into who we truly are. We don't even know who we are because we are, you know, we have to peel back the layers of the onion to only figure out what's really deeply going on inside. And so when I noticed this for myself, I was like, you know, what we need to change the way that our future generation of women operates, and the way that we change the future for our future women is we start with our girls. So this is why, along with the fact that I had twin girls at the time, these all led me to be like, I want to be a part of the change that I wish to see in our girls, and I'm going to do it by running workshops and empowering girls, you know, in groups where they feel safe and seen and heard. And that's really where we're at today, where girl life is like, my. My soul spirited business. And we have 190 women who are girls empowerment coaches doing the girl life work across the globe.

So that's amazing. And I love that you're on a mission to bring girls together to build their confidence and also create safe spaces. That really hit home for me, because I know as a young girl, when I had Anxiety and fear. And I didn't even know what that was really, what was so super important to me, especially coming from some trauma, some sexual abuse, was I craved a safe place, and I wanted to be able to build my confidence, but I had so much shame. So before we go into me asking questions on how you get through that, what do you think it was in you that created that anxiety as a child? Because it was so interesting when you said that I used to have chronic, chronic stomach aches, and the doctors just wanted to give me a pill for stomach aches. But I know looking back now with the work and the healing and the therapy that I've done, that so much of that was from holding down, stuffing down. I mean, I was told, suck it up, cowgirl up, keep going. And so I didn't process a lot of those feelings. What was it in you that was causing anxiety? Was it the pressures of society, of making good grades, or was it something your parents put on you or friends, peer pressure? What do you think that was?

I think it was so. There's so much. And we all come at this from our own individual experiences. You know, I grew up in Iran. I shouldn't say I grew up. I left Iran when I was 4, grew up in Toronto, where my parents really tried to hold on to a lot of those Persian values that they were raised with that no longer serve them, but you kind of do what you do. There are these patterns, and you can only come from your point of consciousness, really. So they were teaching us things that they were taught. And, you know, it was. Was really hard to be in North America trying to live a North American life and fit in with the kids, but with the Persian values where my parents were super strict with us and we definitely heard more than a few times, be a good girl, and had our own meanings assigned to what that meant. But also I, you know, I didn't know my place in the world, if that makes any sense. Like, I. I didn't have a good group of friends, at least not. Not soul friends. I did get made fun of a lot. I was bullied for being different, right, Because I was different. Aren't we all different? But I was really different. And it just. It just, it manifested into what it was. What it was was the stomach aches. But I also, again, like, really, really, I didn't know about my inner voice. I didn't know about my authentic truth. I just thought I needed to be like the other girls. And when I looked in the mirror was someone who didn't look, like the other girls, she didn't speak like the other girls, she didn't behave like the other girls. And you know that, that. That starts something within you, but as a child, you don't know how to disseminate all of it. So these are just a few of the things that led to the anxiety. You know that.

Well, I last. Let me tell you last night, and I don't know why. I mean, we had a great day yesterday. Went spending time with the family and everything. And then last night, I've heard some people call this the Sunday Scaries. I did. I'd never heard that. But last night I got into bed and I thought about some big events that I have coming up. So I get. I get to share the stage with John Maxwell and Ed Mylett and Randy Garn and Ken Joslin. Like, big events, like. And at first, Melody, I was the only female speaker. And I actually told the event planner, I was like, you know, you really should have. I said, we need more females on this stage. I'm thrilled that you've asked me, but can we get some more females? And he did. He actually got a couple of more females on the stage. But I'm all about, like, let's. Let's rise together. Let's bring those females along. Let's bring the women along with us. But I got in bed and I had anxiety. Like, I could feel. It's crazy. I love that you said if we have the ability to, like, make ourselves sick or worried, like, we have the ability to heal. And laying in bed, my heart was beating. I could feel it. And I'm like, I just wanted to, like, I had to visualize myself going in and just kind of holding my heart and being calm. And actually, meditation does help me get through that. But what are some of the things. Because I think that there's a lot of anxiety out there, and you mentioned the word for fear. What are some of the ways that you have overcome anxiety or maybe still overcame anxiety and fear? What are. What is it that you do to work through that?

Sure. These are. These are great questions. And I love what you said about holding your heart. Like, what a beautiful visual for all of us to feel like we can do that for ourselves. Right. We can give ourselves everything that we need in this moment, but we can also deliver to the young girl within what she may have needed. Right. So. And I think that. That it's such a beautiful thing because by giving her access to her empowerment, we are, in essence, rising into our own. So it's A beautiful place to be. You know, one of my favorite tools, and I'll share these are, like, actually some of the tools we use with girls in our workshops that are so simple, but they pack so much punch. Like, they're so helpful. And one of the biggest ones and the ones I hear the most about from the parents who send their children to our workshops is a simple mantra. Peace begins with. With me. Peace begins with me. And these are just a few words that mean so much. What does it mean that peace begins with me? What does it mean for us to remind ourselves of this idea on the regular? It means that we are in charge of our own inner peace. Nobody else. Nothing outside of us can affect the peace that we choose to feel on the inside. And so we. It's one of the many ways that we get to take our power back and to remind ourselves. And I will. You know, you'll hear me say this a lot. Is that we are powerful beyond measure and what's not taught to us. You know, we talked about a lot of the things that were taught to us when we were younger that maybe didn't serve us and that maybe we're ready to. To dissolve and transform. But truly, like, what we weren't taught is that we are so powerful. And if this is just one small idea that we can start sharing with all of the young people in our lives, I think we can change the future for everybody. Because when we step into that power, all things become possible. We realize that we have the power of choice. We get. Yes, you know, that's it.

We have the power of choice, that it's within us. And I love that you share that were powerful beyond measure. It's so true. So I love this, and I think that's one of the reasons we connected, like, instantly, and I felt like you're just my soul sister is because I love that you truly do empower women. And you know what, Melody? There's so many coaches out there and so many people out there that they just want to do it for the money. And you're like, yeah, it's great to be able to do what you love and make a lot of money. We need to make money. But you do it because you genuinely have the heart for service. You genuinely care. And I love that about you and that you're showing girls and women that we have a choice. And I think once you realize that and you can take your power back, it's like, oh, wait a minute. The anxiety kind of just dissipates a little, and so you said, peace begins with me.

Yeah, peace begins with me. As simple as that. And it's so sweet and endearing that the parents whose girls come to our workshops, especially with this one particular meditation workshop, one of the parents shared with me that it was two in the morning and she heard a little bit of noise coming from her daughter's room. She went into her daughter's room to take a quick peek at her. She saw her daughter sitting up in her bed, eyes closed and chanting, peace begins with me. And, you know, it was just such a beautiful thing because she went to help her daughter, to guide her daughter, to heal her daughter in some way. And her daughter had simply had a nightmare. And instead of going to mom or dad or, you know, crying or screaming, not that there's anything wrong with those things, she chose to really be very empowered about it in that moment and ask herself, how can I heal myself in this moment? And that's what she did. And she went quickly back to sleep, and the mom talked to her about it in the morning, and the girl told her, she's like, yeah, I had just had a really, really bad dream. And I had just learned last week in Melody's workshop that I get to make myself feel better in the moment. And this is how I did it. So it's. It feels so good to know that these girls are hearing these messages, embodying these messages, because I have every confidence that when we learn these things from a young age, they become part of our practice, they become part of our everyday routine. And when we get a little bit older and life gets a little bit tougher and we have a few more challenges, we are in a position to move through that with as much ease and grace as possible.

I love that.

And

I heard stats say, and it's probably from one of your posts, actually, because y' all have to check her out. Girl Life Empowerment on Instagram. She posts so many amazing things and also her podcast. But I think I read on one of your posts, or maybe I heard it on one of your podcast episodes that says, Stats say a girl's self confidence peaks at age nine. So that. And that is like, I remember so much of, like, age eight for some reason, I just remember age eight. And you're really trying to figure out who you are, where you belong. And that's when I think so many times your self confidence can be shaken a little bit. So how old are the girls that you're working with?

Yeah, that's a great question. And that stat is sad and true. A girl self confidence does peak at age 9. And so my goal is to get to girls before that age, right? Before the world tells them who to be, how to speak, how to behave, who to love, all of those things. Let's give them that unshakable inner strength where when that statistic hits and when that age hits, that these girls are beyond the statistic. We want to change the statistic statistic for our girls. And so we work with girls ages 5 and up, so we start them off as young as possible. That being said, there are a lot of girls who come to us from age 15, and that's okay too, because these messages are impactful and important and significant at any age. But the reason we started the program so young is once again because we're like, if these girls can. Can use their voices from such a young age, then it's, you know, they really will be unstoppable by the time they hit those ages that statistically they plateau.

Well, what do you. If you've got a girl or woman that you're coaching and their confidence is low, they've had things happen. They've listened to, you know, people who have told them, you'll never be able to do that, or maybe even you're not good enough, or they have felt like they've asked for help and had got the help, so they feel unworthy. How do you teach them to start building their confidence?

That's a great question. One of our workshops is called Self love and Self Confidence. And it's such an important piece of becoming a truly empowered human being is learning how to love ourselves.

And that goes hand in hand, right? Self love and self confidence so much

it starts with self love, doesn't it?

Does it starts with ourselves? Yep, that's exactly. And actually, I had to learn to love myself again after my ex. I mean, I just. I hated myself. I hated the way I looked. I had so much shame. But what inspired me to just be willing to love myself again is I wanted my daughters to be able to love themselves, accept themselves, and have confidence. But how could I do that if I didn't love myself? And so it did. You're so right, Melody. It starts with loving yourself, which leads to the self confidence. So can. Yeah. Can you take us through a little bit of what you do in that process to help these young girls?

Absolutely. So we have actually mirrors in this workshop. We give them each a mirror and do a little activity where we hold the mirror up to ourselves. And I'm sure you're familiar with Louise Hay's mirror work. And that was something that was so important for me, is being able to look in that mirror and say to yourself, I love you so much. Like, I love you so, so much. And first we talk about how uncomfortable it feels to do that, because we were never taught to do that.

Right.

Emotional intelligence is not taught in schools. That's not what we're walking away with. So doing activities like this feels a little funky. And so we call it out with the girls and we ask them, like, how does it feel to say that to yourself? And some are like, it feels silly. Some say, you know, it feels strange because I don't love myself. Like, all of these different feelings and perspectives come up. And we always say, all feelings are welcome here. Right? And this is why we do what we do, so that we can talk about it and move through it. So they. They start saying that. And then we ask them to look in the mirror and talk about a feature that they like about themselves. We do that. And that feels uncomfortable too, because it's just not something we typically do. But then, most importantly, and I think that this is the most important piece of this workshop is I say to them, if you took that mirror and put it on your heart, what would you see? What would be the thing that you love about yourself? And those are the questions that actually reveal character. Their strength, their superpowers. And that's when we really get into the beautiful conversations, because they say things that just honestly bring me to tears. But we just need to remind them Magnificent. And how brilliant they are. And something like that is something that really teaches them that. Like, and I always ask my own inner girl, like, if I were to take that mirror to my heart when I was 7 and 8 and 9 and 15 and I was struggling, what would I see? Who would I. Who would I be? Like, what would reflect back to me in the mirror? And I knew, like, that I was a girl who had so much love to give. I knew that I was kind. I knew that compassion was one of my superpowers. And so, as a grown woman, doing that inner child healing by reflecting that mirror and asking myself what was on my heart and what I would see. So all the processes that we go through with the girls, we have, all of our girl life coaches, first and foremost, do that for themselves.

Oh, that's beautiful. Well, speaking of that inner child, the young girl, what would you tell yourself at age 8 or 9?

Wow. You know, that's one of my favorite questions to ask my guests on my podcast. And so it's interesting that it hasn't been asked of me in the past. I would say to her, you are stronger than you know. Your magnificent as you are. And stop listening to what everyone else is saying and stop looking. Start looking within and show yourself who you are. Like you've got nothing to prove. You got nothing to prove. Just be the best, most kind, honest, heart centered version of yourself. And that's more than enough.

That's beautiful. And you are so kind and compassionate and have that superpower. I love you so much. How do you teach other girls how to find their superpower? Because I believe we all have a superpower, something that just comes naturally to us that maybe we don't even think about. It's just who we are and how we've been. And how do you teach young girls to really look at that and then share it with the world and become their own superhero?

Yeah. Oh, I love this question. So this is actually the final workshop of our 17 workshop.

Really? Are you kidding me?

Nope. It's so interesting. We're so on the same wavelength. Like, we are being soul sisters. But, you know, we, we are born with superpowers. We teach the girls. We're born with so many superpowers, and we spend a little bit of time talking about the superpowers we're born with. Right? Which is. Is very important. And it's a really great starting point in this workshop. But what I'm more interested in is teaching the girls about the superpowers that they acquire along the way. You and I know very well some of these superpowers. I mean, look at who you are as a result of your resilience. Right? So we teach our girls that sometimes it's opportunities that come that reveal our superpowers to us. Sometimes they're tragedies, sometimes they're challenges, sometimes they're accidents, sometimes there. And, you know, obviously we're dealing with young girls, so we keep it light. But we teach them about experiences that they've had that have given them the opportunity to find new superpowers. And we're like, you know, this experience taught me this superpower, and this experience taught me this superpower. And the more that we all talk and open up to one another, the more each girl goes around and shares, like, well, this happened to me in my life. Like, I had a fight with my brother or my sister, and it taught me this about myself and I learned about a new superpower. So while in the past, all they would do is look at that incident and be like, oh, I had a fight with my sibling. It sucked. And that was that. It becomes an opportunity to reflect on that incident and ask themselves, like, what came as a result of it? What strength did you realize you had? What did you learn about yourself? Who are you today? Because that happened, and getting them to think in that way gets them actively seeking throughout the rest of their lives. Whenever things are happening and they're like, why is this happening to me? They can actually look at it and be like, how did this work for me? What did I learn?

Melody, that is amazing. You are teaching these young girls to be the victor of their life instead of the victim. You're teaching them to look for opportunity in every moment. Because a lot of times what happens is, is, you know, it's easy to fall into that role of victim mentality of this happened to me or not take accountability. But you are teaching them to go, okay, what did I learn from that? What am I really good at instead? And everything you do, taking their power back. So I love these tools that you're teaching them. I think we need that now more than ever. That's so important. Now I want to ask you about your amazing book, your newest book. So my daughter has your other book in her room. That was your first book. That was exo.

Exo from a girl who gets it.

Yeah. XOXO from a girl who gets it. And then this is actually my second copy of your book, Empowered Women empower girls. I had the other book and I gave it to someone in my mastermind, and I'm like, okay, I got to order another book. But what I love about your book and y', all, it's a guide to modeling courage, confidence, and self love for the next generation for it. So it's a great book if you. For a mom and daughter, it's a great book for a book club. It's a great book for a birthday gift or a Christmas gift. It's a great book for any young girl. But what I love about it is that it's. It's almost like a playbook book because there's areas for reflection, there's areas that you can really write and do the heart work, as you say, and really discover who you are. So I always like to ask, how long did it take you to write this book?

It took about a year. I wrote it during COVID So many messages that I wanted to share that, you know, my. My XOXO from a girl who gets a book was very much geared towards a young girl.

Yeah.

Like 50 life notes. For the young girl within. But I. So many people asking me, they're like, I want to influence the next generation. Where do I start? How do I do it? Moms, coaches, like, how do I embody these messages? And so this book is really a tribute to that question. And it's like, you know, how do we empower the girls in our lives? And, you know, just to sum up the book, and I talk about all the ways in the book, but it's really about taking a look in the mirror. Like, if you really want to be in a position where you are influencing young girls. And we all are. We are all influencers as female, as women walking this earth. We are all influencers in the lives of every young girl we come into contact with. And I go into details about that. But if we do the inner work, if we notice, who do we surround ourselves with? Like, who are our friends? Are they uplifting us? If our daughters or the girls in our lives are seeing us surround ourselves by women, other, like, people who are raising us up, they will do the same. But if they see us surround ourselves with a circle that's always complaining or gossiping and low energy, they will do the same thing. They are watching us. They are picking up on our cues of what it is to be a woman in the world. And they are, and they are modeling that right back to us. So the real work is in doing the work on ourselves.

Oh, that's so important. You know, I just had a conversation with my daughter last night because she has a couple of friends who were not being very nice, actually. And to really give it to you straight, they just weren't being nice, and I did not like how they were treating her. And I said, ruby, you really need to look at who your true, like, soul friends are. Your true blue friends who are going to love you and. And not be mean and judgmental and, like, said, gossipy, because that's a very low energy. And it's. It's so hard, you know, these teenage years. My daughter is a freshman now. And what would you suggest for a young girl who does have some friends that are not being so nice, maybe gossipy, to set those boundaries or to be like, okay, we're not friends anymore. How would you handle that?

It's really tough. And I for sure have been through it, and I'm continuing to go through it with my own girls, really. Like, first of all, we have to become our own BFFs, right? Like, we need to be so intimately connected with our own selves that when Things like that happen. We are not shaken to our core. Like, we feel the feelings, and that's so relevant and important and okay. But also, like, being okay with knowing that some, you know, we have friends for different reasons. Right. And if these are the friends that you are with 24, seven and they're not being kind, that it's okay to walk away. Like, we need to give girls the permission to feel like they can walk away from relationships where once they want, like, let's just say she just hung out with her friends. They were just unkind and asking ourselves the question, like, how do I feel when I've spent time with certain people? Like, am I feeling good about myself? Are they uplifters? Or am I feeling down on myself? Because they have somehow not been favorable to me and not been kind to me, which causes me to be unkind to myself. And, like, that whole ripple effect of that. And so really helping them get in tune with what it feels like to be around certain people. And once again, that permission that it's okay to walk away from friendships that don't feel good. And you don't have to make. Like, I think with my girls, they always thought they have to, like, make a big ending of it or, like, break up with a friend. It doesn't have to be that way. It can be as simple as, you know, sharing how you feel with them and getting their feedback. If they're open to hearing you out, that's the first amazing sign. And if they're not open to hearing you out or they diminish your feelings, that's a sign that perhaps, you know, just creating distance. Creating distance. And.

Yeah, that's so good. Creating distance. And, I mean, I think we have to do that. It's so hard for teenagers sometimes. Especially, you know, we just moved to Texas, and it's a whole new school, whole new friends. We wanted to make sure we got here year so that she could start high school at the same school. But it is tough. I mean, but also, look, I've had moments in my life where I've had to kind of distance myself from certain people. And it was the people that I. I noticed that I would get around, and it was just all. It was gossipy, and I'm like, that doesn't feel good. I don't want to. I want to talk about big goals and big dreams and how we can impact the world in a positive way. It didn't feel good. And you're right. It didn't have to be a big ending. It just kind of created some space. And it's not always easy, but it's important. And to ask yourself, how does it make you feel? Because energetically, I think that there are people that you are around. I know, like when I see a text message from you, when I see a phone call, when or DM or we get to spend time together, I always feel so good because you are such a bright light and your energy is so amazing. And then I think it's important to pay attention to people that you might see pop up on your phone that your first reaction is, oh, what do they want now? It's like, maybe that's a sign.

That is a sign for sure. I love that you use that example. And you know that I feel the same way about you. Like, you want to surround yourself by the dreamers, right? Like the people who have big visions for us at this point in our lives. Lives. And as Jim Rome says, we are the sum of the five people that we spend the most amount of time with. So, you know, for those who are listening right now, like, who's in your five? Who's in your top five? And you know, get mindful about who you surround yourself with because it's no joke. It's no joke. We start to pick up on the behaviors and characteristics of the people around us. It's just a fact.

Oh, it so is. And you know, I remember Ruby was in elementary school. She loves hanging around funny people. And that's her top thing. Like, she just likes to laugh, so she likes to hang out with funny people. And she started hanging out with the class clowns, but also the ones that were getting into trouble. And I got a call. She had been sent to the principal's office. And I was like, what is going on? And she goes, but, mom, I didn't do it. It wasn't me. I said, but you were hanging around the people, people who did what they did. And before long, you might not be doing it, but you will start. She's like, I'm not going to be doing that. And I'm like, I had to explain to her, you are the sum of the five people that you hang around. So there's one part in your book about stop ghosting your dreams. And I love that. How does someone before. I know we're running out of time, but I could just go on and on with you. I love you so much. How do you stop ghosting your dreams? How do you really start to pay attention to your dreams and go after your dreams and, you know, fuel the fire Fuel that passion. How does a young girl or woman do that?

Yeah, I mean, it's important to just pay attention. Like, what are the things that set our soul on fire? What are the things that get us excited? What do we first think about when we wake up in the morning? And what do we think about just before we fall asleep at night? And really getting in touch with that, because I didn't get to do that for a really long time. Just because I, you know, I grew up in a non entrepreneurial family. My dad was like, you're coming into the family business. This is what it is, this is how it'll be. So it didn't really leave a lot of room for me to dream. So I only started that process in my 20s and 30s. But we all ghost our dreams. Like so many of us are not showing up for that deep calling on our heart of what we know we're here to do. Like, I think if everyone takes a moment to really think about what we're here to do, you know it, you at least have an inkling, right? And we have these beautiful goals to set our girls up to follow their dreams. But what's happening is that we're ghosting ours. And so the message is, if you really want to see the young girl in your life, your clients, your patients, your daughters, your nieces, if you want to see them going after their dreams, give them an example of a woman going after her dreams. What does that look like?

Yes, I love that.

Right? Like, surround her by role models who are going after their dreams. I think that's really what it comes down to. I'm so proud and excited when I look at my daughters. I mean, like, listen, we, we all have our moments, mommy moments as like, there's the tough stuff when we're a hot mess, but there's also like just such beautiful moments of clarity. Like my daughters are so deeply connected to who they are and what they want to do and what they want bring to this world that I'm just amazed. They're 16 years old and I look at them and I'm like, my goodness, what I would have given at your age to have such focus and to know where I wanted to be and how I wanted to move through this world. So. And what's beautiful is they reflect back to me like, mom, you know, you do that. Like, you do that. You're out there trying to change the world in your way. You're out there living your dreams. So it's like, of course we're going to do that and it's just such a beautiful thing to hear as a mom. But a message to all us women is like, it's the win, win that we give when we work on ourselves, when we empower ourselves, when we give ourselves access to our own dreams, then the win, win, like the beautiful effect is that the girls in our lives do the same.

Oh, I love that. You know, one of my favorite moments in life is when I got to go do my TEDx talk in Berkeley and that my daughter came with me and to see her face like she was on stage with me at the rehearsal. And then I have video clips that I will say forever where she's sitting in the front row and she's got her phone and she's videoing. And then she's like taking the video and going, my mom. And I was like, oh, it just makes me feel so good that she sees me using my voice and going after my dreams. Even when I was told from a lot of people, you be a speaker, like, who's gonna listen to you? I mean, I was actually told things like that. And there's even times where, you know, people have tried to put the mom guilt on me, like, well, you just work all the time or blah, blah, blah. And I'm like, but I'm setting an example. And I don't work all the time, but I love what I do. And so I love the work that I do, but I'm setting an example and it shows. Like when Covid hit hit, my youngest daughter started her own business and she was shipping out more things than I was shipping out books. And I was like, she, like one night we were laying in bed and I told her how to make a website and I fell asleep. I fell asleep in bed with her actually. And the next morning we woke up, she goes, mom, look what I made. And she made a website. And I was like, that's what I love. That when they see a us doing things and they might be out of our comfort zone, then it gives them permission to do the same. And it's really, she helps me. As much as I want to help her, she helps me. There was, I remember Melody the first time I was videoing like a course. I was doing this 12 week course and I had my camera set up and I was so uncomfortable. Like I didn't grow up like speaking into a camera. I grew up, up like dancing on stage. So that feels a little more comfortable to me or like home, but having to stare into a camera, oh my gosh. I was pushing Start, stop, start, stop. I was so. And my daughter came over to me, and I think she was like 12 at the time. And she grabbed my phone, she's like, mom, this is how you do it. And she sat in front, she goes, hi, I'm Amberly Lago, and I am a coach, blah, blah. She just went on and on, like, pretending to be me. And I was just. Just like, oh, wow. Like, to see she's, like, fearless and just being who she is. And she was trying to show me stop thinking about so much, about how you look and focus on how you feel. And it just makes me so proud when I see that my daughters are going after their big dreams. And so all that you do with your books, with your. Your courses, with your coaching program, so you are helping other women to become a coach so they. If they can follow their heart and do some soulful thing and make an impact, you actually have a program where you certify people and how to do the work that you're doing so they can have their dream job as well. So can you tell everybody, first of all, the best place to get this amazing book? Tell people where they can find out more about your courses. If they want to enroll their daughters or if they want to become a coach and do your certification, tell people the best way to do that.

So my books are available on Amazon, Empowered Women Empower Girls and XOXO From a Girl who Gets It. And my coaching program, it's like my greatest passion project to date, where we literally train women to become. Become Girl Life coaches, where they go out there, they run our curriculum of workshops, they work one on one with girls, and they get to actually create an abundant living doing work that adds value to the planet. And so I always say, like, this is the intersection of all the things that I love the most, is empowering girls and entrepreneurship, bringing those two together and creating more female entrepreneurs in the world. Because I believe that female entrepreneurs will literally change the world, world and more women with more access to money, to power, to sharing of messages like this one, the greater the changes that we can make on the planet. And we all know that, that we need. That we need this. We need people to the women to step into their divine feminine and to be the leaders that they're born to be so that we can change worlds. And so that's what I'm here for. And to learn more about that, you could go togirl life empowerment1link.com.

Thank you. And you know what? Y' all check out her podcast as well. Empowering her. I mean, I said I got to be a guest, but she has some amazing guests on her podcast. And she also shares, like, some quick messages, too. Shorter messages just on, like, how to deal with haters, how to build your confidence. Like, so many great topics. So make sure you check her out. And thank you. Thank you so much, Melody, for being here and sharing your wisdom and your love and your light. I appreciate you and just value your friendship so much.

Amberly, I love you. Thank you for doing the work that you do. Thank you for showing so many people how to access. I mean, on the topic of superpowers, look at you taking your challenge and really turning it around to access your greatest superpower and being a connector and teaching us what it is to be resilient. I mean, you are amazing, and I'm so grateful for you. I love you so much.

Thank you. I love you so much. And thank you for saying that, like, I love connecting people. It's. I love it. And it's so funny because I just did, like, this two day. I've never had any branding or anybody help me with branding or strategy. And I had the brand builders group come in and they're like, we want to help you with your branding and strategy. And after talking to me for two days, they were like, well, your superpower is. Is in your cause, is connection. Like, that's how. And I'm like, so for you to just say that, I'm like, that's what they pulled out of everything I do. But it is my favorite thing to do. I think that when we have grit plus connection, that's how we are resilient. That's how we make big change. And impact is when we come together and connect. And so thank you for saying that. I love being connected with you, and I'm going to make an introduction to you, to my friend who she's in my mastermind, actually. Her. Her name's Tisha, and I want to connect her with you because she's also impacting young women. And I think together we just create and rise and keep making magic, and we're unstoppable. So thank you and thanks, everybody for tuning in. If you're listening or if you're watching on YouTube, whatever, wherever you're listening, or maybe you're on a run, take a screenshot and tag me at Amberly Lago Motivation or true grit and grace and Girl Life empowerment at Girl Life Empowerment

with one L. Melody, I love you.

You. Thank you for being here and thank y' all for tuning in. I'll see you next week.