Be The Greatest You! Living a Purposeful Life with Trent Shelton

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Welcome to True Grit and Grace, a podcast designed to empower you to claim your resilience and thrive through life's challenges. I am Amberly Lago, a mindset coach, fitness expert and best selling author. Each week I'll dive deep with the world's brightest thought and elite performers to share tangible tools and practical advice to inspire you to keep your eyes on the prize and forge ahead. So get ready to conquer your fears, heal any trauma, lead with your heart, and elevate your life with grit and grace. Hey, y'. All. Thank you for being here. You probably are just like me and most everybody else in the world and safe at home here in California, along with most businesses that are closed. Even our hiking trails and our beaches are closed because of this global pandemic we're going through right now. But you know what? Your hopes and your dreams are never canceled. Right before this whole pandemic broke out, I was actually in Fort Worth, Texas and got to visit Trent Shelton. If you don't know who he is, then I'm so happy that you're here because I want you to meet him. He's one of the most authentic, heart centered, faith filled, inspirational, and one of the kindest people I've ever met, y'.

All.

He's the real deal and he's got a heart of gold. He has such an incredibly eventful life even in this pandemic. And I was so grateful that he took the time to sit with me and and so he could show up for all of us. And boy, could we use some of his words of hope and encouragement right now more than ever. Trent's a former NFL wide receiver who is now considered one of the most significant speakers of all time. He reaches more than 50 million people weekly through his various social media outlets and shares how to create lasting change in our lives. He's the founder and president of RehabTime and he's the bestseller of the book the Greatest yout, which I have on Audible as well. It's so good to listen to that and get a little pick me up during a workout. So if you're listening on your phone, please take a screenshot and if you share it in your story on Instagram, tag me@amberly lagomotivation true gritandgrace and I will share it in my story. So thanks for being here. Introducing Trent Shelton, giving it to us straight up.

Hi and welcome back to True Grit and Grace. Today I have a legend on the show. I can't wait to share his story, his wisdom and introduce you to him. Trent Shelton, welcome to the show. I'm so happy to see you.

Happy to see you, too. Thanks for having me on your show and here in Texas, actually, my office, kitchen, and so it's great to see you.

Yeah.

Well, I knew I was coming to Texas, and I thought, you know, I'm going to see if Trent is actually going to be in his hometown or your home because you travel all over the world speaking to millions of people. So I appreciate you taking the time just to be here and talk to us. I have enjoyed getting to know you more and more. I met you last year at an event that we did together. We were speaking at a conference, and I heard you speak, and I was so touched by everything you shared. But I have to say, even more than that, what you said, I was watching you, and I just noticed how you were with everyone there. Whether it was backstage or it was people that were calling you in your breakout session or walking down the hall talking to people, you can tell you genuinely care about people and want to help them. And you are just a magnet because people feel your authenticity and the love that you share. And you are one of the top motivational speakers in the world. You travel around, but that wasn't always your dream. Growing up, you had something totally different in mind. Can you tell us how you got to be where you are now?

Yeah, for sure.

Yeah.

And thank you for the compliment. Just about, you know, being just real with people, I think I see that in yourself too. And I think we need more of that just from people in this space. And just in general, people always say it's like, oh, you talk to me. You're a human. Like, I'm not supposed to. Like, it's normal to me. You know, it's like, okay to get in my story a bit. Yeah. Motivational speaking, I mean, to even hear you say that, it always is, like, surreal for me. I'm like, man, I am a motivational speaker because by nature, just I'm an introverted person. I've always been that way. My mom, my dad could tell you. I mean, I'm the youngest out of three boys, and they would tell you that if they had to guess when we were little, who would be the speaker? It definitely wouldn't be me. I would be the last choice. So my dream was to play sports. Play basketball, baseball. I mean, pretty much every sport growing up. And I had two older brothers, so it was kind of me, like, they were my heroes. Like, I want to do what they do. And so I was at Their games as a little kid. I owe it all to them because they made me better. I mean, they used to pick on me in a positive way, but they made me better. And I just made up my mind since I was 4 years old that I wanted to be a professional athlete. It ended up happening.

Yeah. You played with Peyton Manning.

Yeah, I played a year with Peyton. Yep.

Yeah. I mean, you did some amazing things. But when I started to look more into your story, and I love your book.

Thank you.

I saw from a very young age, you know, this show's all about resilience and turning tragedy into triumph and learning those tips and tools on how to be successful. And from a young age, you were given the gift of perspective because you actually almost died.

Yeah, I did. I was maybe six. I don't know. My mom says I was older, so from 6 to 10, somewhere around that age, I had asthma growing up, like, really, really bad. I mean, to the point where, like, if I didn't have my inhaler, I would panic. I remember, you know, my brothers checking on me at night. I mean, throughout my whole childhood, you know, it was really bad. Breathing treatments every single night. And we lived.

And that's scary because I had asthma as a kid. And there is. When you all of a sudden, you can't get air in your lungs. You feel like you're dying, but you actually almost did.

Yeah. I mean, in New Orleans, where it's humid, too, so it didn't make it easier, me playing sports, but it was a particular time where I was coughing really, really bad. And I don't know the correct term for it. Now, I'm sure they have a cool term for it, but the doctor called it coughing asthma because I was just coughing so bad that literally, like, the white around my eyes, right, turned red. Like, my blood vessels popped. I was getting teased at school, called a demon. Like, it was just bad. People, when they look at me like, what's wrong with that kid? I just look really sick. And my mom, her best friend, her name was sister Stuman. She's passed away, but she saw me. She's like, you need to take that boy to the hospital now. Do not wait. And that day, we went home, got all the family. We went to the hospital. So I lived in Kenner. New Orleans, downtown is probably 20 minutes away. So on the way there, I was coughing so bad, we had to pull over, and I was throwing up. And basically what I know now was I was dying, and I didn't even know it. And so we got there we got to the icu. They rushed me back there. And I just remember my parents had left because I think they did some paperwork. The doctors had stepped away, and there was this kid and his father. I still remember, like, it was yesterday that were. I think he got shot. I don't know if it was a BB gun or a real gun, but he got shot. And they were the only people really there. And then I basically stopped breathing. And a guy's like an angel. I still remember his face. He looked back and he saw me not breathing. He started, like, yelling. Obviously, the machines were going off, but he's like, y'.

All.

I can't say what he said. He was like, yeah. He was like, that's the last thing I remember. And I remember then waking up and seeing my mom around me crying, and my dad and the doctors and basically, you know, died pretty much. And from there, I stayed in the hospital for a few weeks.

And as a young kid, that's so traumatic. I mean, just to be in the hospital is traumatic, but to literally almost die. How did you feel? Did you feel something shift in your life at that time? Did you have an experience of, okay, I survived this. Did it put fear in you? Or did it put, like, motivation in you?

Or, you know, I don't know in that moment going back, if I felt fear. I'm sure I did at that age. But I just know that when I look back, I think it really put motivation in me, like, on how precious life is, because I've had so many incidents in my life where, you know, a second too late or whatever, like, I wouldn't be here. I mean, caught a wreck, that luckily I survived. And I just realized, like, I'm here for a greater reason. And so that just really stuck with me growing up. And I didn't want to waste any time. And so I just went hard at everything that I did.

Well, in your book, you have a story. And you guys, if you have not read his book the Greatest yous Yet, it is amazing. I have the book. I've got pages turned, and that highlighter pen is out. And on Audible, too, if you aren't a reader. I have it on Audible, and it's great. When you go to the gym, you can just listen to it. But you tell such great stories in your book. And you told one story that really touched me about one time. I think you were in church and you felt like a gust of wind come over you. And I had a similar experience, and I had never really shared that with anybody. And Then when you talk about it, I thought, oh, my gosh, I'm not alone in that. Can you tell us that story about what you felt? Because I think that you really are here for a reason. And at a young age, God spoke to you.

So, yeah, for sure. It was actually a Benny Hinn convention. You know, I know people have their opinions about Benny Hinn now, whatever, but it was back then, 1980s, late 1980s and early 1990s, and he had a crusade. We're still living in New Orleans. And I was like, the youngest, obviously. So, like, I'm my mom's, like, role buddy, so I'm going with her everywhere if I didn't want to go. And so, like, but this one, I wanted to go. And we went there and I just remember he told everybody to stand up, lift your hands to the Lord. And he was just speaking, you know, and praying, and he. I want to say, he blew into the microphone. And I felt just the power of the Holy Spirit in that moment. And it pushed me back. And I asked my mom, I was like, did you feel that? She was like, feel what? You know, I was like, you didn't feel that? And she was like, well, that was the Holy Spirit, Trent. You know, it's funny because throughout my whole life, I mean, since I was a kid, all the way till I answered my calling, like, there's been so many times that I could say how people have spoken to my life and that I was going to do something, like, basically what I'm doing now. And I never believed it, I never saw it, because I was so focused on what I wanted to do that I couldn't see what God. You know, it wasn't even my radar. And so I just wanted to say that to people out there, like, when people speak into your life and make sure it's the right people. But when people speak into your life, when you start to hear a common theme that people say, I wouldn't ignore that because it makes sense of where I'm at today through all the people who've spoken to my life throughout my years of living.

Yeah, because you had your eye on one thing. It was like, I am playing ball and that's what I'm going to do. And then you had an injury that changed everything. And it was really a moment for you in your life of, I have to make a decision. I gotta sink or swim. Can you tell us what happened, like, in that period of your life where it was a life changing moment for you?

Yeah. So in the injury, it wasn't even that bad of an injury, but it was enough of an injury to hold me back. And as a wide receiver, you know, even the smallest thing, I mean, you're running full speed, having to stop and plant the smallest thing. You can have a sprained toe, and it can really limit you. And so my knee, what I know now was nothing but a lot of inflammation in my knee. But I literally. I would pop pain pills just to go practice because I knew if I didn't practice, I was gonna get cut and go home. And I just remember the one time where it was my time to actually shine and play. I was with the Colts, and Coach Dungey told me the whole week, he's like, hey, like, you've been balling out. We gonna need you this week. We have some injuries. And that week just happened to be the week where my knee was the worst, and I was trying to hide it so much. I mean, I was on so much medication.

Trent, do you know that I had a show dancer? My biggest fear was, like, to blow out my knee or something. I had a broken leg, and I was about to do a can can. So I totally understand that feeling of, this is it. I have to get on stage and do this. You had to get on the.

Yeah, I got to do it. I got to do it.

You got to push through the pain. You got to do it.

And I tried. I was lipping, and I mean, where I was at in the. To maybe I was an all star receiver, you know, at that point, our starter, I could have got away with it, but it was like I would have to play special teams. He's like, hey. I mean, that Thursday, he was like, I don't think we can use you. You know, it's basically like, you're not 100%. I was like, you're right. And so at that moment, even though that was. I had two more years in NFL, like, that moment was the moment I knew that it probably wasn't gonna work out. And, I mean, not being a negative person, but it's just something in my soul was like, man, that was your moment. And now I look at it, and I'm glad that it didn't work out, because I wouldn't be doing what I'm doing today. But, yeah, that was the moment that changed everything for me.

Yeah. And I think we have experiences that we go through that lead us to exactly where we're supposed. And sometimes in those moments, they suck. It takes you down to a low place. But I think sometimes in our darkest times, is where we really kind of find our purpose. And you talk a lot about purpose, about people, like, how do they find purpose? And you write about it in your book. You talk about it, like, when you go speak, talk about it on your podcast, which your podcast is amazing.

Thank you.

I love it. Thank you so much. It's really helped me. And we'll get into that. But what would you say to someone who is in a dark time right now and they're struggling and they don't know their purpose, and they don't even know what to do, and it's hard to even get out of bed and take a first step? What would you suggest for them to do?

Well, I would tell them first to. And I know this sounds impossible when you hear this during those moments, because if somebody would have told me that my heart is sounds, they're like, trin, shut up. I would say to find appreciation in it. Because the problem with us is that as humans, we try to define things, right? And what I mean by that is that we try to define a moment, saying that this is going to lead us to something that's going to last a lifetime. That's not true. Just imagine. I mean, even with my story, right, I was defining football as a loss, but it wasn't a loss. It was obviously my greatest gain because it led me here. And so I've learned in my storms and my dark moments to be very careful about how I define those things. And so I say, everything is power. So even when I just got over the flu, I mean, as hard as that was to say, that had to cancel speaking engagements. I said, it's power because of this moment. It is doing something for me. Maybe it's, you know, I'm staying home with my kids or whatever. I'm always trying to find the positive. The positive in everything. And people ask, like, why do you do that? I'm like, why not?

Yeah, like Trent. That's what we were talking about before we started recording. Why I had. For the first time, I had some haters. And I know everybody has haters. I hate even to say haters, but they were coming down hard on me because I was using positivity to get through my pain, because I live in pain every day. And so nothing worked medically. Nothing. No pills, no operations, no spinal stimuli, nothing. So I had to change my mindset. And that is what works. It's not easy. I mean, you got to get up and be willing to do it. But that positivity is what has given me a life of joy and happiness, despite, you know, what, you had the flu, or despite me living in pain, I think there's always a blessing. There's always something to be grateful for, and we can find those positive ways to look at it. How do you go about finding the positive in something that's difficult?

So I use leverage on my life, and I'm a leverage person. I always ask myself this question, like, do I want to live with this pain? Right. That's the case for the rest of my life. Do I want to live with this mindset? And I'm always going to make decisions that serve my future. And so I have a conversation with my future self, with The Trent that's 90 years old, and, like, hey, when you get here, like, there's. There's no turning back. And so you want to make sure you don't waste your life or, you know, stay negative. And even if I look back on my past, the times where I was negative and nothing wrong with that guy's listeners, by the way, I'm not saying anything is wrong with you or that's you're human. And I still go through my times where I doubt, I have fear. I just don't stay there. But I look back on my times where when I got cut and released in my hardest times, in my rock bottom, and I was throwing a pity party, I was blaming everybody. I was negative. I didn't want to go out. I was isolating myself, and that literally did nothing for my life. All it did was, like, quicksand. I just stood there, and I just kept sinking deeper and deeper in it. And it took a lot longer for me to get out of it. And I promised myself, I said, I'm never going to allow myself to get this low again. Even during hard times, I'm going to use it and say, okay, there's a purpose in it, because there's no strength without pain for us that work out and we walk our run, whatever you do, you know that's true. You have to go through it in order to be built by it, right? So you have that choice. So for me, that's how I look at it. And I always say, this is building me, not breaking me. This is power in this moment. And I'm gonna find something in this moment that did something for me that no perfection could have did or no win could have did. My son, Tristan, they lost the super bowl, his championship, and he was crying, his heart was broken. And I said, I want you to remember this moment. Let this moment be the moment that just because you lost, it built something inside of you that winning the super bowl would have never built. And he looked at me and said, you know what? You're right, dad. And so every time he forgets, sometimes I remind him. I'm like, I might get the worst dad award or the Best dad because how you look at it. But I always remind him because he lost 16, 18. And so I tell him every time he's slacking, I just say, 16, 18. Remember that? And it clicks for him. And so as I teach Tristan and as I teach myself and everybody, like, ask yourself, what is this loss going to teach you this time? I'm going to teach you that no win could have ever taught you. And I think when you look at life like that, it just makes it a lot better to grow.

Yeah, I think that I learned my most valuable lessons from my failures. And you talk about that, too in your book, about the value of failing people, that sometimes they don't want to fail, and so they don't try because they're afraid of failure. Just about failure. That you had said. Three questions. One, if the truth was written on your tombstone, what would it say? Number two, if your life ended or your story ended today, what? You know, would you be happy with that? What regrets would you have? And what is something about your life that if you died, it wouldn't live on?

Yeah, that def. Couldn't kill. Yeah, that's.

That's like building a legacy.

Yeah. I think that last one really sticks with me a lot, is like, what am I doing in my life now that death couldn't kill? I mean, obviously, you know, the Kobe Bryant situation is tough. You know, it's touched the world and it's new. The thing that you see in that situation is so many things that death couldn't kill. And I just tell people, like, look at your life. And that tells you how you're living. Because if you're living something that when you leave here, something lives on, it means you're doing some incredible things while you're here. And I just always check in with myself, you know, weekly, and ask myself those questions, like, when I get even older or when I get to my last days, like, what regrets am I gonna have? Like, did I do this or did I do that? And I don't wanna have questions. I wanna have answers. You know, I wanna say, I did. I went for it. I failed, I sucked at it. Who cares? But you know what? At least I tried it. And I've experienced it, and I know I don't wanna live in the unknown. I rather live in the known of me going to try and do something.

Yeah. And you are legendary. And I say that because you touch the heart of whether it's young kids to, you know, people my mom's age and older. And I was telling you before we started recording how I was so excited to come to Dallas and get to see you. And so I'm waiting online with the airline. You know, she's trying to figure out a ticket. And I told her, I said, yeah, you know, I'm waiting. She's looking for a ticket. I said, yeah, I'm gonna go see Oprah. And she goes, oh, that's nice. And I said, still waiting. And so I'm kind of small talk. And I'm also going to get to see Trent Shelton. And she screamed. Screamed like, I had to drop the phone. She was so excited. So you are already building this legacy and you're changing so many lives. You've helped me just with, like I told you, when I was having a hard time, it was the first time I'd ever experienced haters. And it was something where I felt like I was just trying to share some tips on how to be positive and stuff, and it was not expected. And listening to your podcast about you, I'm like, who could hate on you? And that you even had a hater, and how you handled it really helped me. And you just share love and you show them love. Do you still have people that.

Absolutely. Absolutely. Like, I mean, people would say it's not Aristotle's quote, but Aristotle gets to credit. But it's. I talked about on that podcast, like, if you don't want to receive criticism, say nothing, do nothing, be nothing. Like, if you put some out into the world, I mean, there's not a person that has achieved anything that's even breathing. They don't have to achieve anything that doesn't have haters. Or I like to say confused supporters. And I still receive it because I like that.

Confused supporters, exactly.

Because if you break it down, it's not really hate because the things that you hate, you don't pay attention to. Right. If I gave you a food that you didn't like, you wouldn't. Even if it was a buffet, you would skip right over it. You're like, oh, I'm gonna get the mushrooms. But I hate mushrooms. No. And so when somebody's giving you attention, it's not hate, right. It's usually pride, jealousy, ego with things that they're going through, but they probably admire what you do, because they're paying attention to you. And so that was one of the things that really helped me shift because, yeah, I get it every single day. Because you got to realize, like, if I put out a message, you know, that somebody uses and saying, okay, well, I'm not going to settle for less in my life. And so they cut some people out their life, then those people are probably not going to like Trent, you know, just because they feel like, oh, it's Trent's fault. Because most people want to point fingers and accept their responsibility. So I understand where it comes from. And understanding is very key in life. Like, when you understand, like anything in life, you say, oh, okay, this is why this has happened. This is why they do this. This is why they give me hate. This is why they come on my page and leave nasty comments. I get it. It doesn't bother you as much. And so with me, I mean, I'm either one, I sympathize for them, or two, it's just funny to me when somebody tells me something like, that's hilarious. I'm usually laughing. And they don't expect that. They want you to get mad and you give them the opposite response. They disappear by themselves. So I always say, just. Yeah, just laugh. Yeah.

There was one girl that was like. Cause I was telling you I was recently on the Doctors doing an interview, and she said, if I got on there, you were terrible, you were crap, blah, blah, awful. She said some awful things and she said if I got on there, I would really tell them how it was and this and that. And I said, girl, I hope you do go on there because we need more people like you to just speak up and give some awareness to crps. And she was shocked.

Yeah, she didn't want me.

I was like, yeah, I'm gonna be cheering you on. And she's like, oh, oh.

It's like, oh, I want. Yeah, that's where they get their significance from. And so if you're going to respond to someone, you know, one of the best things to do is not respond. But if you are going to respond, then make sure you give them the opposite response that they want. And that's what usually happens. They're like, oh, like, so you fight love with hate and love wins all the time.

Yeah. And I wanted to talk to you about if someone is really struggling with. They're in that place where I know that they're sending hate because they're in pain, you know, they're just hurting themselves or they're in a dark place for me, it was really having to accept my situation, and that's what gave me freedom. Do you feel like acceptance was kind of the first step for you into having the life that you have now?

Yeah, acceptance is power. I have a rehab process that it's actually in the book. We don't really lay it out like that, but I wrote it like that, so it's reality. Release repairs my three R's for my rehab process. And part of reality is in the first chapter. You'll never win your award by running from your battles. And so that's about acceptance. It's about saying, okay, this has happened to me. Okay, I'm going through this, I'm dealing with this. And that's not a weakness. That's the greatest strength you can have. Because once you accept it, then you can do something with it. But as long as you're running from it or sweeping it under the rug or trying to hide it or trying

to drink over it or eat over it or shop or date or whatever you're doing to try to numb it or ignore it or run from it, it's still there and it always catches up.

Yeah. You'll never fix what you're not willing to face. And so go face. And I know it might be scary to do that, but just know that there's something better waiting on the other side. So that's advice that I take every single day of my life too. I mean, there's things that I have to deal with, there's things I have to accept, there's realities, you know, it's just like, ah, at times I want to run from it because running from it feels comfortable. But I know being comfortable doesn't change your life or doesn't bring healing, you know, so you got to go through that process of being uncomfortable to live a more comfortable life.

Yeah. I didn't realize that I was running, like, literally running. I was in track and I would run from everything. Whether I was sad, depressed, or even happy, I would literally run. And it wasn't until I was stuck in the hospital bed and I couldn't run anymore that I realized, oh, man, I gotta face all this crap I've been running from. And it's hard and it is uncomfortable, but it does that saying that I used to hate. The truth will set you free. But it's true.

It's true. It is true.

But take us through your rehab process because you have rehab time, which when I first found out about you, I was like, what is that? What does that mean? And it's like, you just change your life with this. Can you talk us through a little bit of those points?

Yeah. So the word rehab, just even me coming up with that word. So it started in 2009. I was still trying to pursue the NFL, and I just remember being in my room, and this was the moment that changed my life. I don't even know if it was, like, some magical moment, but I was looking around, and I was just like, man, where's my life at? I just started crying, and I just told myself, it's rehab time. And I didn't know what that meant. I just knew the word rehab meant that from an injury perspective, it means, like, you go through a process, and the process isn't always fun, but if you do it right, you know, you'll come back stronger, you know, if not physically, but definitely mentally. And so I was like, man, I want to put my life through that. And so I just said, it's rehab time. So rehab means putting a strength back into a weakness. And so whatever that weakness is, for me, it was mind, body, and soul. And so I went on that journey, and I broke it down into three things. So first is reality. And my definition for reality is you'll never win your war by running for your battles. So with something in your life, and this is an everyday thing, by the way, or weekly things, it could be for your business, for your personal life, for your parenting, whatever. It's what reality do you need to face in your life, right? What have you been running from? What haven't you addressed? What haven't you faced? That's a conversation, because if you don't face it, you'll never fix it, period. I mean, I don't care how you twist it, how you hide from it, how much money you get, how many followers you get on social media. Even with this, a lot of people, 20, 20, and everybody wants a new destination. I tell people, that's great. Having goals and a new destination and where to go, that's awesome. But it does no good to go to a new destination carrying the same baggage. Because when you get to that new destination and you unpack those bags, guess what's still there, right? All those problems and insecurities, it's harder to deal with it. So drop the bag is fix what needs to be fixed. The second R is release. The definition I like to put release is there's certain bridges in your life that need to be burned because there's certain things your life cannot afford to go back to. So people say don't burn bridges. Understand that context. And I believe you shouldn't just burn bridges. But there's certain things in your life that you know you cannot be a part of that cannot be a part of your life anymore. Maybe it's habits, maybe it's people, maybe it's places that you go to and that keep leading you back to a place you don't want to be. Because you'll never build the right bridges by keeping the wrong bridges. And then the last R is repair. And repair is simply getting down to the root issues of your life. Right. Fixing the root so you can build something beautiful. Because surface level solutions don't change anything, right? They don't. They just fix things at the surface. But if you don't fix the root and that problem situation, insecurity, habit will find its way back to the surface. So what's the root issues in your life? Maybe it's something that you had since you were a little kid. Maybe it's a mindset that you were given because you watched your parents a certain way. Or maybe it's a teacher that said you weren't going to be anything. And like myself, that happened to me, where a teacher told me that. And every time failure came up, I started to believe it. And I never knew, even after football, like, even when I was in rehab, I never knew where it came from until I realized, like, dang, like, this came from second grade.

Yeah.

You know, so, I mean, we carry

those things with us. I think that especially when we're that age and we're that young, we're so impressionable. And, you know, I just was visiting my family here, and my sweet little nephew, I got to spend time alone with him, and he was diagnosed with dyslexia. So we're sitting there and he says, aunt Amberly, you know I have dyslexia. I said, oh, you do? I said, well, do you know, some of the smartest people in the world do, too. I said, they're very successful. And he smiled. And so we talked about it, and I just think, you know, we need more people like you. Trent, the first talk you gave was for 5,000 students, which is, by the way, the hardest audience that you could possibly have, and you touched their lives. Because you're not just somebody that gets up there and talks. And sometimes, I think even when the name motivational speaker has sometimes gotten a bad rap, because everybody wants to be a motivational speaker and they call themselves that, but you're not that person that's just getting up there Talking. You've actually been through some these hard experiences from little up until going to play football. And so people hear you and they're like, oh, the difference is they can tell you've been through it and you've gotten through it, and they see how resilient you are. And so they go, oh, well, if he can do it, I can do it, too.

Exactly.

But it's a lot of work, I

like to say, like, reality, you know, speaker. I think that's motivation. Like, when people give me that title, of course I have to identify it, but I always tell people I just like to come from a place of reality. And I'm never going to talk about things I don't know anything about, because I feel like it's a thing. Like it's almost like an energy thing, or our connection thing, should I say, where you can feel like you could say the greatest stuff ever, but if it's not real for you, you know, then it's not going to have that same connection, heart to heart, for people. I've just realized that because I remember I would watch speakers and pastors and everybody, and I would sit there and think, like, those words are great, but I feel like they don't understand me or I feel like they're too put together. Like, I could never be that person. Like, I'm inspired in a way, but I can never be that person. It's like, for me, like, I'm almost more inspired by the person at the gym that's out of shape, that's their trying and pushing through it, than the person that's in shape. Like, I'm way more inspired by the person that's out of shape because I'm like, man, they're actually going through the process right now. And I'm sure person that's in shape went through a process themselves, but I always take that as a speaker. I'm like, man, I don't ever want to be the person where I feel out of touch, where people in the audience say, I understand Trent. I feel Trent, but I can never be like him, you know, because he's just so far out of touch. And so I just try my best to always come down to anybody's level. But I want to let people know I'm not at the top of the mountain talking to you. I'm like, I'm hiking it with you. I might have been to the top, but I'm back down here. Because that's life. You know, we go through our ups and downs, but I'm here Hiking it with you, not trying to tell you how to get up here.

That's what I love, too. And you write about that in your book about, I'm here with you. I'm on that mountain with you, beside you. And that's how it comes across when you're speaking, too. Even a lot of times sit down on stage and tell people, come closer, and you make them feel it's a community that you've built, and you can feel that. And I think that's one of the reasons that people have just gravitated to you, because they can see, they feel that you make people feel a part of. And so I love that. But it is hard every day to be willing to look at things and accept them and look at it as acceptance instead of, you know, for me, it felt kind of like I was defeated. And so I had to switch that mindset around. And this isn't that I'm defeated or I'm giving up. And it's not why, but it's what's next, what can I do next? And that took a lot of forgiveness on my part, to myself, to other things. And then I loved how you talk about forgiveness. And what would you suggest for somebody who is having a hard time forgiving and they're feeling stuck because they're just in that resentment and anger, what would you suggest they do to start and bring forgiveness into their life?

Yeah, a few things. The first thing is I would say three things that help me with forgiveness. Because forgiveness is hard. You know, even today, I still struggle with it. Like, if somebody does something, I'm like, I'm not forgiving them ever in my life. But I realized three things. One, just being a man of faith that we've all been forgiven, God forgives us. And so that's always like, if God can forgive us, then who are we not to forgive? Others. Second thing is that you're going to need forgiveness. We've all done something to somebody that we've needed forgiveness for. So again, if you expect it, then you need to give it. And the third thing is, for I think the biggest breakthrough or one of the biggest breakthroughs is do you want to live with this for the rest of your life? And most times it's somebody who's hurt you, somebody who's done you wrong, and they've controlled so much of your past. By not forgiving them, you're giving them the power to control your future. And when you understand that, it has set you free, and I know it's easier said than Done. But I mean, I've had situations in my life. I mean, I talked about in the book where my business situation where a guy that I literally helped out stole money from me and like, I wanted to catch a flight and like go up there, just like, that's not the right thing to do for one. And then I realized by me holding onto this grudge, I said, I'm not trusting anybody, like in the business world. And so basically I was making people pay for mistakes they didn't make. Right. I was letting this person's character become everybody's character. And that's not fair. And I realized how many, you know, good partnerships, relationships that never got started because of this one person. So I was like, you know what? Let me forgive him, because I don't know what he's going through. I don't know what pain he's in. You know, maybe if I was raised like he was raised or going through a situation, I would have did the same things too. Right. Kind of sympathize for them. That's helped me really release forgiveness and not hold grudges and not hold things inside. Because first of all, I don't want to leave that to stress, which stress leads to all different types of things in our life. And so, yeah, so give it because you deserve it. I mean, they do too, but you deserve it. You deserve that freedom and peace.

It's really for you. I mean, one of my best friends, friends, been divorced for years and still hangs on to some resentment and grudges from her ex husband. And it creates a lot of stress. And I told her, I said, he's robbing your joy right now. He's not thinking about it. He's over it. He's stealing your joy. And so when you look at it as you can forgive someone, it's really for you, so you can move on, so you can have more.

It's not a weakness. It's one of the strongest things you can do. And forgiveness doesn't mean you have to put yourself back in a situation. I think people or forgiveness doesn't mean that you excuse their behavior. It makes their behavior okay. It doesn't make what they did to you okay. No, it's just saying, okay, I'm going to live the rest of my life free from this situation, free from this person and, you know, move on. And that's what you deserve. I mean, nobody deserves to be controlled the rest of their life by somebody or something that has moved on that is no longer part of their life.

Oh my gosh. I am sure the guy that hit me in the SUV while I was riding my motorcycle, he's not thinking about me. I was just talking about this with my mom last night, and we were talking about my book, and she said, yeah, I remember the editor had edited, and he added in your book how angry you were at this guy. And I was like, that's. Why did you add that in the book? I was like, when I was in the hospital, I didn't have time to be angry. I just wanted to heal. So I was worried about and thinking about what can I do next to better my life instead of getting stuck there in that anger. And it's okay to feel that, but you just gotta move on, keep moving forward.

Absolutely.

Now you are doing everything from speaking. Your podcast just came out. Was that in December? Yeah, December. Yeah. And it's like, already top podcast and got a million reviews.

Yeah.

And so I'm loving that. But you also do, like, a master course or do you have a membership as well where people can get a little bit.

You know, I have my inner circle. This is called Trends Inner Circle. It's a place for application. Right. I mean, motivation is great, but it's not enough. Inspiration, information, all these things. And so this is the place where, like, I'm giving you the tactics to be like, okay, this is how you do it. And also, it's just community where, you know, I mean, my audience is so big that I can't, obviously, when I can, I try my best to connect with everybody, but it's just a smaller community where people can have more access. And also not even just to me, but a community of people that will hold you accountable.

Accountability is huge.

Yeah, it is.

I can't do anything without accountability. I need that. So that's awesome. And how do people find you? Yeah.

So Trent's Inner Circle dot com. It'll take you right there.

Yeah. And if y' all aren't following him on social media, which you probably are, but just in case you're not, do you still have the link in your bio on Instagram, Rent Shelton?

Yeah, it should be on there. I have a link tree. Yeah.

And then I saw you have another book coming out.

I do.

I am blown away at all. You do. What is the new book called?

Straight Up.

Okay.

The new book is called Straight Up. It's actually. I don't want to say I like it better than the greatest you. The greatest you from. I think it's a reader's book. You know, I think it's. I mean, it's an easy read, but, like, if you're a reader, you'll enjoy it. Straight up is more for the person that probably doesn't like to read and like myself. It's funny. Like, I'm writing books. I don't like to read, but I understand the importance of it attaining information. You will really feel the me that people see online. Right? You'll feel in this book. It's short chunks. I'm straight up about relationships, straight up about healing, straight up about your past. And it's targeted to kids from 13 all the way to 20. But it is literally, I wrote this for everybody. And so if you're thinking, oh, okay, I'm 30, this book is not for me. It's for you too. So it's for your kids and it's for you. And I'm really excited about it because I think it's just an easy digestible book to read and to apply.

Well, I thought the Greatest yous was a great book. I mean, like I said, if you look through it, I've got highlighted, but I like Audible. I like listening to it on Audible. Will the new book be Straight up be available on Audible as well?

It will. I'm gonna have to go through that process. I tell everybody, get the audiobook. Because the audiobook was so hard. It is so hard.

Oh, God, I'm doing that in two weeks. I'm nervous.

It'll be fine. So it just depends.

You make it sound easy. Let me tell you, you sound really good.

So the first day, it's tough because you're sitting in a booth and you're there for hours. So we had it scheduled out, like, okay, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday. I'm done with the book. So I was like, okay. I'm used to recording myself. This would be easy. And so I'm reading it with passion. And I'm not like, I don't have tea. I'm not really drinking water. I'm not taking breaks. I'm trying to bust through it. And I lost my voice probably like halfway through the first day. So I had to reschedule. We had to do like, basically once a week instead of like three days back to back. So it's tough. I couldn't even listen to it. This is crazy. I'm probably, like, terrified. You. But it might be a different experience for you, but. And it's great because people need to hear your voice, obviously.

I don't like hearing my voice, actually.

You don't like it?

I don't.

I used to be like that When

I got my TedXTalk back, it took me three days before I could watch it.

I understand that. Yeah. I'm kind of like that, too.

It's hard.

I'm kind of like that, too.

But I need to.

I always feel like, for me, that I always do better than what I thought, because you're gonna be a harshest critic, and so it's nothing wrong. You're always gonna do way better than you think. Especially with people, like, you might say. You might stumble. People aren't gonna pick that up. You will. Because, you know, like, oh, gosh, I

pick myself apart for sure.

Yeah. So don't. Just don't. But, yeah. So with the book. Oh. I couldn't listen to the audiobook for the simple fact I think I had, like, ptsd. Like, I really think I did. I know it's. I know it's scary. I know that seems, like, super dramatic. Like, I. Like. Because I was in the car, and Maria was my wife, we were in the car. I listened to the audiobook, and I was listening. I was like, I can't listen to it. I just can't right now. But I've listened to it after that. But it was just like. It was long experience.

Oh, gosh. But doing that.

But as long as you just prepare, like, I didn't prepare. So if you prepare in it, just take your time, take your breaks. Don't try to rush through it. It'd be a way easier process.

Okay, well, that is leading me to my next question. Before we end here, I wanted to ask you, because that's really resilience to have to keep going and to do all that you're doing. And I'm kind of in a place like that where I'm like, you said, you didn't prepare for it. I'm thinking, okay, it's on the book. I got to do this, this, this, and this. And I'm just going to run in there and start reading. I'm glad you told me to prepare, because that really helps. In fact, I have this thing called pacer that I do that helps me be resilient. And the first part of it stands for perspective. And at first, when I first came up with it, the first letter started for prepare. And that's so important with resilience, is preparing for a situation. And in fact, on the way here, my stepdad dropped me off at my rental car place, and he said, did you read his book? Are you going in there, you know, blind? I don't even remember what he said, but I was like, oh, no. I always prepare. Like I prepare, I want to make sure that I know what's going on. It's to the best of your ability. But what would you say allows you to be so resilient because you do so much? How do you claim your resilience?

Well, one, I think sports taught me a lot. And being resilient. And I accidentally might be my podcast episode today. I might just flip it up for everybody, straight up. But I think sports taught me a lot to be resilient, because you have to be. Emotional resilience is something that I try to talk about a lot. I feel like it's one of my strongest traits. And with emotional resilience, it's just three things that I feel like helps you be emotionally resilient. All that is, it's basically when your emotions arise, you don't cave to it. I like to say facts over feelings. And so. So just because you feel something, it might be real, but it doesn't mean it's right. And so the first one is to build emotional resilience. I tell myself when it comes to being emotional resilient that, well, I'll just go, it's not in order. But nothing lasts forever, right? That's the second thing I tell myself. But nothing lasts forever. And I realized that. So this pain, whatever is going to end, this confusion is going to end. This bad day is going to end. No storm lasts forever. Another thing I tell myself in being emotional resilient is that I understand what pain produces. I understand what this is going to produce. So when I'm running, running is the perfect example for emotional resilience. I understand. Yeah, at mile, people always ask, like, you must love running. I don't love running at all. I love what it brings. And there's not a mile where I feel like I want to stop. But I just know me, keep going, it's going to build something greater inside me, right? Getting in shape. And it's the same thing with anything you do, whether it's emotional, spiritual, or physical shape. And the third thing is, which is probably the most important, building emotional resilience. Quitting is not an option. And so I always say, I don't bring a towel to throw in. So even if I want to reach for a towel, there's no towel there. And I just figure it out and I push through it. Because when you leave the door open to quitting, you'll quit every time. It's just who we are as humans. You'll find the easy way out. Because your brain is programmed to find what's comfortable for us. And so I say quitting is not an option. And so whether it's having to go record or the book, like, I wanted to quit, it wasn't an option. So I'm gonna find a way through, you know? And I think when you have that mindset, it makes you become more emotional, resilient. The more you do that, time and time by time back again, you build that muscle of being emotionally resilient.

I love that. And I think that sports really helped me as well. My track coach really helped me. My dance teacher really helped me. Because with the track coach, it was like, I don't care if you're throwing up, throw up off the track and then keep running, you know? And the dance teacher was like, I don't care if your toes are bleeding. This show must go on. Are you gonna do it? Because you can quit, and you won't be a part of this. And so I had to learn to shift my mindset because I thought that resting meant quitting. I felt like there was no time for rest. You had to just keep going. And I had to remember that resting and quitting, resting is just recovering and replenishing, and it's really respecting yourself enough to go, wait, I'm worth it. I can rest so I can be resilient. And that was kind of hard for me. But I love your mindset around resilience. And I think the one I like the best is quitting is not an option.

Yeah. And, like, I'm glad you tied that into that, because just about it's okay to rest. I mean, it's okay to listen. I mean, I'm just going through this sickness. It's okay to listen to your body. And I believe one of the strongest strengths is learning how to be still, you know, especially when you're an entrepreneur. You're an entrepreneur, you're a go getter. You're used to pushing and going. And as athletes, we judge so much of our life off performance, right? It's like, okay, I have to be able to perform in order to feel value. Learning how to stay still and just rest is a great discipline to have also. So you have to find that balance.

And actually, that is what led me to my darkest time was having to be still when I was used to running, and I did not have any tools to get me through those hard times until I really hit rock bottom and then slowly climbed my way out. But being still is definitely a superpower, you know, just to be Still. And I think it's those times that we really find our true purpose too, and our calling, if we can just be still. But getting back to what you said about the self worth, when I couldn't run, when I couldn't perform, when I couldn't train clients and bring in income, that was my whole identity. And I felt worthless because what could I provide? What could I do? What is one way that you could tell people to really start to find their self worth when they're feeling pretty worthless?

That's a great question. The thing that I would tell you not to do is first understanding what worth is and where worth comes from. And we all make this mistake. We tie our worth to everything external. We tie our worth to our job title, our social media following, how many people buy our books, all those things,

especially now with social media. Are you verified? Oh, if you're not, I'm not going to talk to you.

Exactly. And that's not what you should tie your worth to. Because if you are, you're basically being a puppet and you're letting whatever puppet master whatever it is. It could be social media, it could be whatever control your life. And however that thing is doing, that's how you feel. And so you have to really know yourself. I know we hear that a lot, but knowing yourself is understanding yourself, owning yourself, everything about you, embracing your flaws, realizing you were created with worth, realizing that there's no one like you. That changed everything for me when I realized. And I know you know this, like we all know this, but we don't really embrace it. Like there's no one in the world like you, period. And so if you're looking for a miracle, it's like, why do we value things in the world that are custom made, right? I mean, if it's a purse, that's the custom made. If it's a car, if it's the one of one of this, we're like, wow. But we don't do that with our own self. We're all one on one, like there's nobody like you. And so I always remind myself of that in those moments. And I understand worth. And if you're listening to this, you want a deeper version of this. I actually did an episode called Know youw Worth or how to Know youw Worth on my podcast. I think it's episode nine.

And I listened to it. It's amazing.

And I break it down so that like just the, you know, the acceptance of self and the confidence of self, if you understand what that is, acceptance, everything about you and confidence, you know, realizing that there's only one you in the world. I think that really gets you out of that funk of feeling like you're worth. You're not worth anything in life.

Yeah. And that really changed for me when I was all scarred up, and then the doctor in the hospital said, oh, well, you'll never wear shorts again. You'll probably never train clients, and you definitely won't run. And I was devastated. And it took a long time for me to finally look at all my scars as something that I had survived. Instead of, I'm damaged goods, I'm broken, who's going to want me? Who's going to want to train with me? But when I did accept it is when my life changed and I could start to finally build some confidence about even wearing shorts. Like, you know, I wanted to show my daughters that you can embrace your flaws and awe. You know, what if you feel like it's a flaw or you feel like there's only one of you? And I try to tell my kids that. So I love that. But, yes, listen to the episode on Self Worth. I just listened to that the other day, and it really breaks it down so straight. Trent Shelton on Apple is where I listen to it, but it's probably. What, on Stitcher?

Yeah, anywhere you can find a podcast, and there's a quote, and I'm gonna butcher it, but it's by Tina Linford, and she says, when you know yourself, you become empowered, and when you own yourself, you become invincible.

I actually wrote that down to say. And I forgot to say yes, because I loved it so much. I was listening to it. I was at the gym. I stopped it to write that down. Yeah.

And it's true. You know, when I came across that quote, probably years ago, I was like, wow. Like, this is it.

Yeah.

Like, when you really own yourself, you become invincible. And it's true, because it's like nothing nobody could use against you. You're good with everything. And so I think that's the key to life.

Oh, I love that. Well, thank you so much. Thank you. And you guys look out for the new book, straight up. If you haven't already read it, read the greatest yous because it will change your life. You've changed my life. You really have. And you're changing so many people's lives. And I just appreciate you coming on the show. We all love you, Trent.

Thank you. Thanks for having me. I appreciate you.

Thank you. And y', all look in the show notes. There are links to his website and social media. Thank you so much.

No problem. Thank you.

Thank you so much for joining us this week on the True Grit and Grace podcast. Don't forget to hit that subscribe button. And it would be so awesome if you rated and maybe left a review. That would help too. And also, I have some exciting news for you. If you are ready to learn a mindset that will get you through any challenge, ready to really transform any limiting beliefs, and finally find the wellness routine that work with your lifestyle and keep your body healthy and thriving, you're in the right place. You're hearing this for all the right reasons because it's your chance, your chance to join. Right now. It's a 12 week course. It's so much fun because we're going to go live in a webinar with plenty of time for Q and A. It's called you'd Unstoppable Life Mastermind. And there's going to be a daily mantra and a like minded community to support you along your way to reach all those goals. So head over to amberlylogo.com mastermind and sign up now. Okay. Have a great week and I hope to see you in the Mastermind.